on the outside, looking in

Hi guys, I`m gonna have some self pity today.

Yesterday was ruined for me. It was 1 of my 2 days a week out. Carer got me ready in my best togs, matching jewellery and a bit of tutty (make up), all ready to meet sis in town for a slimming club meet and a wander round the shops.

About an hour before it was time to go, I needed a wee…or so I thought…no, it was an unplanned bowel movement and boy, did it go for it…big time!

Well I was on the throne for an age, couldn`t get properly cleaned up, togs had to be washed…I had to have a 2nd shower…then got hoisted up to find more of the lovely stuff (yeuk). I was literally all wiped out!

So how did my special day go? It didn`t! I went to bed with commode, pads, wipes and bed squares at the ready.

I didn`t cry…I fumed and swore and then some more!

The title of my post is coming true too often lately.

I feel as if I am on the outside watching other folk enjoying life and doing just what they want to do.

Not me. I usually keep bright eyed and bushy tailed, but not just now. Moan completed. But still feeling mentally bruised. Humph!

luv Pollxx

Oh Poll how awful for you!!!

Big ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) from me.

Thinking of you darlin’. Rant, rage, moan, scream, cry, shout and anything else it takes!!!

On this forum you are very much on the inside. I know it’s only a tiny weeny bit of consolation, but hope it helps.

Lots of Love Pat xxx

Hello Poll,

I am so sorry to read your bad news. Most of, if not all of the people reading this, will know just how you feel, I know I do. I was looking forward to a morning out tomorrow, but my left leg has got its own identity crisis, or issue, or whatever else it tends to have, and I can’t go. On Friday I have to go to one of these stupid meetings at the DWP, just to prove that yes, I really am as ill as I claim to be. I know just how disappointed you must be feeling, when even our small pleasures are taken away from us. But fight the good fight Poll and keep your pecker up.

Lots of love,



Thankyou Moira. Oh those flamin DWP folk......grrrr. Hope the damned thing goes your way. It chuffin well should!

luv Pollx

Hi Pat, I new I could rely on you to console me.

This on the outside etc thing stems from eons ago, when I joined the local MS group. I was the only one without a dx. At my daughter`s this weekend, the kids were playing on the lawn and I so wanted to get on the grass with them and do roly polies.

But I did play ball catching and thought of a brill game, which kept the kids amused for ages. There were some old cushions and one of the kids drew numbers on them, then I shouted Grandma says got to number 1......5.........8 etc It wore them out and gave me some laughter too.

At my slimming club, I cant get weighed. So teech cant properly include me in discussions. I feel I ought to keep mum…and that is sooo hard for me.

Oh I know I have so many blessings to be happy about…it`s just soooo…oh you know!

luv Pollx

Sod the keeping mum Poll. At our age we can say exactly what we like when we like!!! If people don’t include us we just have to push our way in!!!

Great game you thought up there.

My grandson loves having me lying back in recliner chair, with bendy reading lamp in my face… while he plays at being the dentist! Very funny especially when he first saw my gold fillings and his eyes were like saucers!

Let’s be pushy women of a certain age Poll. It’s expected of older women and hey you are from the North so not only expected but an absolute MUST! It’s tradition!



yeh, you`re right!

luv Pollx

Oh Poll, how awful getting all your best togs on and face only to find you couldnt fulfil your wish for that day. I cannot imagine how disappointed and fed up you must have felt. Afraid I would feel sorry for myself, but what the heck, its wasted energy isnt it love.

Please dont feel deflated (even though your bowel was in the end), there will be good times still where your bowel behaves. Think the key must be to try stay positive in the hope all will be well, but I do feel for you. Dont wonder your thinking your missing out on things. What we often took for granted previously was that we could come and go when we wanted, whenever we wanted and didnt have to consider anything else. This darn disease plays havoc with our mental wishes, but you know the people around us must feel similar and try spur you on.

I know your strong and cope very well, however my heart goes out to you luv. Tomorrow is another day and the day after etc. We all love you and send you loads of ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))))), sharing is caring.



You sweetie pie! You`re another of my dearest buddies. xxPoll

Hi Polly, I’m really sorry to hear this, you’re always so bright, this this condition is a real bi**h at times, just hope you feel a little now, take good care, Jean x

Oh Poll. That sucks

Not sure if it will help or not, but the way you face these things is an inspiration for the rest of us. We can only hope to deal with everything life and MS throws at us as well as you do.

Karen x

Poll how horrible for you. I totally agree with Karen, you are amazing. You have all this going on yet you still support me and loads of others.

I wish I lived close to you, I could have come round and taught you some more swear words I learnt off a 2yr old having a tantrum on the bus Thought the old lady behind me was going to pass out

Hope you feel much better for your next outing and you will have to shop twice as hard.



I am really sorry to hear about what happened. Moan away!

I hope you can do twice as much shopping/nattering with your sis very soon.4666666666666666666666615.




(cat pounced)

So sorry for that Polly, I know how you feel (about other folk enjoying themselves), sometimes it’s ok to feel sorry for yourself and to get mad. I often find that i go to the loo for a wee and no 2 happens, apparently the messaged get a bit messed up. I used a suppository the other day and must say did feel like I was in control for a change.

Hope you are feeling a bit better now and good luck for the next trip out.

Love Wendyxx

Hi Poll,

You were kind enough to answer my post on a horrendous episode I had with my bowels, now its my turn to send you((((HUGS)))) . I’m so sorry you had to go through that, and particularly that it meant your day out never happened because of it.

I think this is one of the worst parts of this crappy disease.

Hilary x

Hi Poll,

You were kind enough to answer my post on a horrendous episode I had with my bowels, now its my turn to send you((((HUGS)))) . I’m so sorry you had to go through that, and particularly that it meant your day out never happened because of it.

I think this is one of the worst parts of this crappy disease.

Hilary x

Thank you so much to all who replied. It means a lot to know I have good support here.

Today is another day (Scarlett O`Hara). I feel better. The sun is shining. I am looking after my grandkids, while their mum is in court…she has finally sold the marital home and her ex has refused to sign the conveyancing, so the judge is doing it for him!!!

Hope things go her way for a change.

I AM going OUT on Friday!!!

luv Pollx

Dear Poll,

I wonder if you realise how many of us read your posts and marvel at your strength, positivity and fortitude and a big dollop of humour!

I’m not diagnosed…loitering in limboland, but I love to read your posts to remind myself to be positive and not to focus on the difficulties.

This week I got to Fat Class on my scooter and thought about you, and raised my coffee in a silent toast to you.

Thanks so much xx