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Willow first week - positives and negatives

Apologies for going once now had willow every night since sat and she is loving it. She’s gotten in to a good routine has a nap morning and afternoon, has a lovely egg on her forehead when she tripped at mums when we were round for dinner and has bad nappy rash. I’m loving having her I feel like I’m complete. I look at her and just think how lucky I am. On a not so positive note I’m exhausted. I’ve just slept all evening. My arms are aching and stiffening where there must be weakness and my muscles are physically sore to touch. I’m wondering if you just keep going if you can only get so sore you get used to the pain. Not much chance of her going back to mum and dads, dad carries her to the car to help me and she cracks up holding her hands to me. She doesn’t want anyone to do stuff for her but me. It’s amazing she lived with me for 3 months my parents for 9 how the bond can be so strong. We did gardening just potting flowers. She thought she’d try compost lol to my disgust she said yum yum lol. Anyway enough my babbling on. I’m guessing tomorrow will have to be quieter. Even though I hardly did anything x

well done em

you’ve obviously done the right thing for you both

save your energy for the precious things, like potting flowers if you’re able or just lots of cuddles.

keep well and enjoy your little treasure

carole x

Rest when you can … your lil girl will make you work through the pain etc. May even make it easier in some respects. The clear point here though is she is clearly best with you for her happiness and for yours. Just because you’ve tjis terrible disease doesn’t mean you can’t be a good mummy. I work for social services and we support mums to maintain their mothering role … this is mums with varying conditions not just m.s. But what I’m saying is if you begin to struggle there is support out there and that doesn’t mean having your little girl stay elsewhere. :-)☆ well done hunni x And she’s a beautiful name xxxxxxx

Hi, Good luck to you love, I haven’t got kids, never have, my choice, too old now anyway, its hard dealing with this condition, but when you’ve got kids and your only young it must be awful, just take each day at a time, do what you can and enjoy it, no your limits adn save your energy for the good times, again good luck, x

You know I think your great Em. Callum and Willow are lucky to have you as their mummy. Ask for help when you need it. Xx

Dear Em,

How wonderful that you have managed to be ‘a proper mum’ again. lt is hard work - and your children will -even at a young age, soon realise what mum can do and what she can’t, at times.

My MS started when l was pregnant with my daughter. Who is now 31. l had some good neighbours who helped me when times got difficult. Hubby worked away from home - and l had no family nearby. Getting a toddler into and out of a carseat was not easy - especially as back then they sat in the back seat - not the front as they do now. l used to carry her up and down the stairs - with me on my backside. Eventually, l got a stairlift - and that made life so much easier and safer.

l bet most of us like to read your posts - and wish we could be just around the corner to help.

You will find your children will grow up having a good caring outlook. And more independant and confidant. Encourage them to do more for themselves. When my daughter went to stay at her schoolfriends - the parents always remarked how good she was - tidying up - washing up - even making cups of tea and bacon sandwiches. She was always very welcomed. l don’t think she missed out on much having a mum who could not walk unaided.

Do try to sleep or rest when they sleep - instead of rushing around trying to catch-up on chores.

Love to Willow and Callum

Hi thank you all for you comments. It is so hard, having meals at my parents is brilliant so dont need to stand . Prepare etc. But Callum is now we should maybe eat at home more. And it’s amazing how you push yourself for your kids. Saying that we stayed at home last night and went to the fish and chip shop Callum wanted Cullen skink it’s all he could think about. Saw the health visitor today who is pleased with everything they have been great. Willow through a tantrum down the road I was not impressed to say the least. I know we all love our kids and are blind but Callum has never once thrown a tantrum, don’t touch meant it, she’s needing licked into shape lol however they are 2 completely different kids. Willow is easy going, but very determined and look out if she’s not pleased. She’s getting frustrated she’s trying to speak I know she’s only 13 months but she has a language of her own bless her but she is really trying, she’s quick the health visitor sAid she has a very good understanding. Her ‘boobs’ are the fascination this week she points at them if you ask her whete they are shrugs her shoulders all shy and giggles lol Callum’s more quiet, he’s a thinker he should be a politician when he’s older lol, he’s very diplomatic If you ask him a question you can literally see him analysing his response. It was lovely being nice weather today. Kids all dressed nice. Willow being willow had to get changed 3 times before we got our, the last outfit I changed her into I wasn’t very impressed with on and Callum turned and said your bit really wearing that are you to go out. The other outfits were much prettier that’s a mess had me chuckling under my breatne but I wasn’t happy with it so did change her out on a dress and he stayed that’s much better she looks beautiful now. I worry he’s worrying outside you can see a bit of frustration every now and again that wasn’t there before. I can’t leave his side he wants to know whete I am all the time. The other night we fwll asleep on the sofa woke I lead him up to bed he was sleep walking got him to his bed, he closed his eyes then shot up and said you did remember to inject didn’t you! Lovely that he cares. So he’s now totally interested in birds and garden insects etx. So I’ve had to buy bird seed and he feeds them twice a day then just sits and watches them. He can be very kind. Though his dad can now come in and the dog annoys him. Ghillie was his for 7 years too amazing how you can switch off feelings! But Callum now has been distant with ghillie and told him the other day to give him a break. So mission is to now get him to bond again. His dad bought him fish as bribery to get him to stay which is fine but they’ve a habit of dying so his dad just buys him more again understandable but it is learning him that things die so you just buy more you throw the old ones away. That really annoys me as pets and pets to he loved and cherished. But that’s my ex family way. Their dog got run over the week of our wedding then the next went missing his corpse turned up he’d fallen chasing a bird in a barn falling through the hay and couldn’t get out. Anyway Thanks for your comments about her name. Willow was supposed to he Sophie until 3 weeks before she was born now I want her to be free and never trapped so got changed to willow which I normally like traditional names but willow felt right. Her middle names may after the biggest inspiration in my life, I had a dancing coach who travelled 4 hours to tutor me she wasn’t my teacher but she approached my mum and said I’d all the potential to go far. She never once charged anything. She was truly inspirational she died of cancer when I was 16 I never got to the funeral as it was exam time. And I’ve always regretted it. People said she used tl show them my letters when they visited her. So it felt right to use it in my daughters name Sorry for the long post Em x

OH Em, what a truly inspiring mum you are to all the young women here, who are wondering about starting a family, or who have just become new mums.

You`ve had so many struggles in your young life but your grit and determination has won through…are you sure you are scottish and not a yorkshire lass? !

Willow is a beautiful name and i`m glad you decided to call your daughter that.

Keep going lass, dont forget to rest when you can. Dont worry about boring stuff like housework…make your main task each day to enjoy those gorgeous kids of your`s…and maybe make a note of the incredible things they do and say…for a future memory book, maybe.

Callum is a true thinker…yeh, he`s gonna be somthing extra special when he grows up…maybe the man who finds the cure for MS, eh? Wow! Now wouldnt that be something?

much love Pollyxxxx

Thumbs up good lass xx Mich

Em I am so pleased for you, your post really cheered me up you have some good news and your little girl is back with you. It has been really tough for you recently and you deserve nice things to happen. Let’s hope it continues. I looked after my godson on Monday he is 15 months this was the first ttime all day on my own my parents are usually here but they were away. I loved it, made me feel alive. I had some challenges like I needed to use the loo and can only manage the upstairs one but didn’t want to leave him on his own so he managed to crawl up himself and then we came down with him on my lap had to leave crutches at top. Then when he was at bottom crawled back up to get crutches then back down. When we went back into main room I had to rest for an hour but he was so good. I do feel proud of myself. I am so happy for you Em Barney

Hi Barney sounds like you and your godson hassle great fun. Kids are amazing but they’re not easy on the body. Had a BBQ at mums last night and somewhere in my competitive brain I thought I could play football. Was trying to show Callum you don’t step back u look for an opportunity. This morning my legs are wondering what the heck u was playing at, going to bed didn’t make them recover I’m I’ve completely fatigued them. So reckon a day where they’re not used much in order. So I need to sort out willows nursery and do the toy room both can be son on my bum lol. Callum thinks far too much worry about him at times. X