Weighed down so far can't get up now

Hi everyone

Hope life’s treating you ok and this year brings us all some joy, or at least more joy than pain, that’ll do.
I would appreciate any advice or comment on my weight problem, I know basically its my own fault I’m fat and that I keep failing to do anything about it. I put three stones on over last three years , I don’t have big relapses and only take small amount of pregabalin , so other than terrible fatigue I have NO EXCUSE!
I have tried every diet and excercise as much as poss but its obviously not enough, I eat the right things but prob too much of them and am reluctant to give up my last pleasure of a few glasses of wine. I am sinking now, I’ve had CBT as I suffer with anxiety, I find mindfulness very helpful , I don’t think I’m depressed but I feel hopeless , ugly , worthless and stupid. If I can’t lose weight then I really don’t see any future or happiness for myself, I don’t want to take a y meds that increase appetite etc and I am seriously looking towards gastric surgery as a last resort. Although everyone tells me I look great, I hate myself a d can’t even look at myself undressed. My first grandchild will be arriving soon a d I am desparate to help myself but I don’t know how.

Hi - I’m sorry you are starting the new year so unhappy with yourself wanderer. Though you might weigh more than you want to, that doesn’t mean all the other, subjective, things apply. I really know from personal experience how it can all get muddled up, and very frustrating. Maybe read through your CBT notes and check what sort of thinking you are doing?

The arrival of a first grandchild is a big thing - fantastic in many ways but I bet it is stressful too, and makes you think where you are and that can’t help if you’re feeling so low about yourself.

Have you tried weightwatchers? It’s a robust scientific approach and you can benefit from the group, if that’s your thing.

If you’ve got the funds, buy something you really like that fits, feels comfy and is flattering. And maybe think about losing 7lbs to start with, rather than all of it ? It isn’t ‘easy’, ms or not. You can do it though.


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Have you thought about slimming world online i joined in July and i have lost 1 stone and 5 lbs i am nearly halfway to my 3 stone target, i cant do much excercise as i cant walk very much at all but i do Pilates laid on my bed,and i go on my excercise bike for 5 minutes twice a day,

the weight has come off about a lb a week and some weeks i havent lost,but xmas time i have not gained either so thats good,you can eat cooked breakfasts too which i love

Its not really a diet and there are some really good recipies online i love the tikka masala made with yogurt and quark.

I have also found that i dont want to eat junk as much now,its lost its appeal. you can eat as much fruit and veg as you want too which i love,i snack on fruit all the time now instead of chocolate

i feel so much better for getting this weight off and cant wait until i reach my target.

J x

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also forgot to say that you also have a weekly weigh in,mines on friday and that helps,and they send you encouraging emails too,theres as much online support as you want too.

once i got started i love it,and its helped my self esteem too.

when your 1st granchilds born life will be fantastic,my little grandaughters 2 this month and she gives me a reason to smile every day,being a grandma is the best thing thats happened to me in a long time,it really is.

J x

Thanks so much you two for your encouraging and hopeful comment. Means a lot xx

Hi I’m sorry to hear that you are feeling so low about this. I managed to stop smoking this year and have put on approx 2 stone since May. I stopped smoking using hypnotherapy and am thinking of trying this for weight loss. I have been (temporarily) successful in the past losing weight with Slimming World and Weight Watchers but I have put on more than I lost both times. I know they work for some people but for me restricting any food just makes it more attractive! I think working on improving my relationship with food, seeing it as a fuel not a comfort, is what I need. Just wanted you to know you’re not alone. Let me know if you find a miracle solution! Or just how you get on… Take care. xx

I like weight watchers filling and healthy I can hardly walk too but I want to get back to it is there any foods I should avoid?

Thanks x

Once all the xmas extra goodies are gone - then is the time to start trying to lose some weight. Just aim for 7lbs to begin with as someone has already suggested. Slimming World online - now that sounds a good idea - might look at that myself.

Only weigh yourself once a week at the same time - in the same sort of clothes. l like the 5/2 diet - where you eat normally for 5days of the week - and cut right down to about 500 calories on 2 days. These are called the fasting days - and you do not have to do it on consecutive days.

There are lots of hidden calories in food - wine especially. So do see if you can cut down - if you can’t give it up. Don’t have biscuits sweets cakes etc in the house. You do not need temptation.

l don’t drink alcohol as my balance/walking is so bad - and one drink l am struggling to keep upright.

Food is fuel - and you only burn what you need - too much just turns to fat. And the heavier we are the harder it is for us to get about.

lf you can lose 1 lb a week - and stick with it - you will soon notice the difference - and doing it slowly usually means it stays off.

We should have our own slimming club on here!

l am going to start this week - and aim for losing 1 lb.

All the best.

i would really recommend slimmimg world, for anyone because its not a diet it teaches you how to eat sensibly, i eat more than i ever have done and am loosing the weight at about one lb a week…the recipes are so nice too,using yoghourt and fromage and quark instead of cream,and eating fresh too which i love, i feel so much better for not eating processed foods too you are allowed ‘syns’ too so you can still have treats,i save mine for a mini bag of maltesers lol…

J x

I think space jackets idea is great, have our own slimming club here. We could all do the diet that suits us while encouraging each other when the going gets tough. I would like to lose 2 stone and am going for a sensible eating plan from tomorrow. My aim is to lose it by summer.


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good luck Anne i have lost 1stone 5lb and i am nearly halfway to loosing my 3 stone .

J x

Well done j you must feel so much better.


Thanks so much for all these great comments they are so helpful. I too think the idea of the ms society having its own equiv of online slimming world would be fantastic. As for diets I have decided to try the 5-2 one, starting tomorrow, will let you know how I get on x

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Don’t forget to share recipes like ww 2 crumpets with bacon medallions and poached egg with baked beans or slow cooker recipes like stres or casserole I’m making a beef one this week or next x

Meant stews can’t edit lol

Hi Wanderer, ah your first grandchild how lovely, i have about 9 now and a few greats lol…

Now is it a medical fact you are overweight or is it how you perceive yourself? Just asking as my daughter always tells me she is overweight but she looks fine lol…

OK throw the diet out of the window, waste of time, they just make you yo yo yo yo…I have watched my eldest daughter on slimming world for years now, one minute she looks great, then she is overweight again, same as her partner…it never seems to stay OFF…all this phaffing about with green and red days cant be doing with it lol.

I am 63 and I weigh a healthy 11stone 3lb for my height of 5ft 8ins. I have maintained my weight throughout my illness actually i did drop recently 3lb because i couldnt eat properly.

Its all about BALANCE, and sadly have to say it…you really have to stay focused…

How do i do it?

Easy. I simply realised i live a sedentary life therefore i dont need the normal amount of calories per day. The first thing i did was throw away my dinner plate lol…I went down a full size plate and this is never allowed to be full to the brim…

OK you need to eat slow realease carbohydrate food…these will keep you satisified for longer.

Buy yourself a soup maker, Morphy Richards is great.

So I start my day with a coffee, then I drink water…

I always have my breakfast which is gluten free oat, or quinoa and I use Almond Milk as this is low in fats but very very high in Vitimin D, B12 and all the other things we need.

I have 1 small gluten free cake and a capochino nescafe at 11am…yes i do i treat myself…why not.

lunch 1pm. i make a quick soup. I always put in it the slow release carbs NON STARCHY VEGETABLES such as spinach, kale, tomatoes, broccoli, cauliflower, cucumber, onions and asparagus, sweet potatoes, mushrooms stuff like that. I have a bowel a day and then a piece of fruit, banana or something similar. The soup fills me up as I always put in sweet potatoe…which again is a slow release carb… or, if i fancy it, one Pitta bread filled with salad stuffs. Pitta breads are slow release…

Keep handy a fruit bowel and drink water all day which fills you up. NO SUGARY FIZZY DRINKS…if you must drink wine, then go for a low calorie wine.

Kabinett Riesling, Alsace Blanc, Gruner Veltliner Qualitätswein, Muscadet these are only 92 calories per glass (portion not full lol).

Dinner. I just eat small portion of fish, chicken breast, vegetables (as many as you can eat), some new potatoes, or rice, a salad or a nice omellette filled with mushrooms and spinach. But i use my small portion plate…not a normal DINNER plate.

I then always have a nice yoghurt for desert, and yes boring water lol…

Thats it folks…it fills me up all day. I am NEVER HUNGRY. I have trained my stomach to only eat what it needs. Actually now i find myself eating less…

BOREDOM is the worse thing people do eat because they are bored. If you feel like a snack then crunch on a carrot or celerey all good stuff…

I have eaten this way for years now and never put weight on.

My daughter is always on SW she looses tons of weight, then xmas comes, or she gets sad or down, and piles the weight back on again which is no good for her.

So if you can get into a healthy mindset you dont need all the food…you just eat normally healthy food. Chuck away all the tins and processed and fizzy drinks, and eat healthy every day…

Boom, its sorted lol.

Oh i make smoothies too love them have them as a snack too.

Its fun eating healthy and like i said i dont feel like I am on a diet, and i am not calorie counting everything…cos i know what is going into my meals.

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slimming worlds not actually a diet it teaches you how to eat healthily,but if you go back to your old eating habits than you do put the weight back on,i dont do the red and green days cant be a***d with all that, i just cook from scratch and eat lots of fruit and veg and feel so much better for it

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Please excuse me for suggesting that you think a bit more about low mood and how it might be draining joy from yur life just now.

Seriously, it does sound as though you are being way harder on yourself than is good for you.

Please do think about talking to the GP about your mood. If you are stuck in the glooms, everything will look impossible: that’s natural. When mood lifts (maybe with a bit of help from medication), a person can much more easily address things like getting into shape. Many more things move into the realm of the possible. The hopelessness of low mood is just the pits. I hope that you can get some help with that.

Good luck.


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Thanx so much everyone, I’m feeling more motivated to eat even more healthy and less overall, I also realise I need to tackle my low mood to get a bit of self esteem back so I’m going to work through the 8 week mindfulness for health course book I’ve got off amazon x

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