Forum

Very short fuse

Hi. Just wanting your opinion. I have noticed over the last few months my mood has been very up and down. Feel unhappy but genuinely don’t know why as I love my family life. I love my work too. But yet having a lot of moments where I think very negatively which isn’t like me and I’ve even wondered if things would be easier if I weren’t here which is a thought that quickly goes and I can honestly say I don’t feel suicidal or anything. But I don’t want to be like this. I have a very short fuse esp with my young child which scares me. I feel I’m shouting more than needed, occasionally smacking when actually there could’ve been a better way to deal with it. I also feel because of this my young child who is 4 is acting this out a little at school and its effecting him a little. Also I want him to have good memories not ones where he remembers mummy losing her temper a lot. I’m thinking of going to the GP and asking about medication. Is there anything that can help and is this because of the m.s. in regards to my m.s I consider myself fairly lucky so far but I anticipate a decline if I carry on like this. Advice please. Gone anon as I’m a lil embarrassed. X

Please see your GP and/or phone the helpline - number at the bottom of the post. Good that you are aware of what you are doing and seeking advice, dont’ feel embarrassed about it as we all need help from time to time… All I can suggest with the little one is to try RAID (reinforce the appropriate - ignore the disruptive) easier said than done but honestly it does work. Obviously you cannot ignore life threatening behaviour but for the more run of the mill behaviours it works. Have you a friend or family that could take your little one for a few hours to give you a break?

I think I have seen too many questions in the same vein on here to dismiss the emotional side of MS. Considering what it does, any aspect of your life that concerns the brain can be affected.

Its good that you can see this side of yourself and that you know you need to do something about it - definitley a positive and means that you will be more likely to follow through in getting it sorted.

Go see your GP or MS nurse and have a word about medication or even just to have some-one you can talk to and get things off your chest. I’m sure if you asked your loved ones they would rather have you with a bit of a temper than not have you at all.

Take care hun & good luck

JBK xx

Thanks for that advice. I don’t feel I need a break esp as he’s at school now hence probably his learnt new behaviours. However I do feel I need to be able to control my temper and feel I lose it quickly almost not remembering and doing it without thinking. I’ve heard that theory you said from a friend but she termed it ignore the bad reward the good. Thanks. Is there something they’d give. I was on citalopram for PND however then I felt more anxious. Now I just feel unhappy (I think with me more) and I want to enjoy my boy too. X

I am sorry that you are having a difficult time. You know what is normal for you, and you know from experience that things can go awry but are fixable with a bit of help. I think your idea of talking to the GP is a very good one. There are medals for soldiering on when there is help available. We have plenty the matter with us that cannot be fixed - low mood (with luck) can be. I hope that you feel much brighter soon.

Alison

p.s. there are other anti-d medications, so it is worth mentioning to the GP the problems you had with citalopram.

Thanks for the advice guys. Don’t know what I’d do without this site. Always been anti meds for moods etc but I feel I need to look at this. This definitely cannot go on like this. Not fair on my little boy. I go to bed so sad for him as no matter how I’ve tried to keep my temper under control quite often I really haven’t. As I said he’s now sometimes displaying angry behaviour and I don’t want this. Makes me sad. Damn m.s doing this to my wee brain :frowning: thanks x

I get so confused as tonight my lil man was very naughty … Yet I remained quite controlled. He got shouted at although not as loud as I feel I have been shouting in them episodes of short temper! But I felt really chuffed with myself however tomorrow is another day and the short fuse may be there! Doi try and see if I can control it and breath etc etf or do I approach the GP as I must admit my worry is a snap before I think almost and it does seem that I can’t control it! Maybe I’ve answered my own question there. But I do want to thank you all again. Is it connected to m.s this or another problem? :frowning: x

Anon, You could have written my story, I too have been very short with my family, the littlest thing drives me nuts, I do not seem to care about anything, I don’t care about work. All this is not “me” at all, been to psychology, did not get any meds, just don’t know what to do. I did read all the posts from above, just don’t seem to care about anything… Sorry to sound so down Greg

No Greg it’s fine. I do think there are meds to help…in fact I know there are as I come across people with various degrees of depression etc and they are medicated to help them. I’m sure there must be something that we could take to help but I can’t decide if its the answer but then if its due to the m.s its not going to go way is it as its connected to damage in the brain? But how do we know its this? I do care about things, my family and I love my work. However I just feel so short tempered and it scares me as I think horrible things sometimes which I never did! Could you approach your GP re medication? I’ve never had any counselling etc and not sure it would help as I’ve been diagnosed since 2004 and do feel I’ve got my head around the diagnosis although have bad days as we all do so not sure how this will help the temper and the unhappiness I feel. You see now why I can’t work out why I’m unhappy as I don’t feel I’ve anything to feel unhappy about as such although the m.s is a dampner but I am usually a very positive person! Xxx

Anon, I too was dx in 2004, until last month I was RRMS, now SPMS, I guessing that is what has me down, like you, not quite sure I have my head wrapped around this yet. Just writing about this is therapeutic for me. My situation isa little strange, I am an American living in Belgium for 15 years and I do not have a GP. Am looking at moving back to the states soon just to get a full time doctor. Other than your mood, how else is the MS effecting you? Greg

I do relatively well I think. Had a relapse at the beginning of the year which left me with a weaker left leg. This cause me to limp after a very short time but I’m used to that now. I have a walking stick but so far have not had to use this. Winter may change this but we will see! I cope well with m.s. I get miffed sometimes but who doesn’t? And I get jealous of other people who just have a normal life sometimes as I would love not to have to think about the m.s etc. Writing like you is very therapeutic and helps us see we’re not alone. I am married and whilst hubbies is brilliant he will never understand it. I just want my mood sorting as this is making things difficult for me and I’m worried it’ll cause a relapse, cause a family rift and also cause my son to have awful memories and dislike me in the long run for this! :frowning: Hope you get sorted soon hun…you definitely should seek a GP out even if its in Belgium? X

Just wondering if anyone else has a take on my post and advice, also is it the m.s causing it? X

Anon, Just wanted to apologize for spilling my problems on your post. I do hope you can find better answers than what I provided! Greg

No don’t apologise. I’m glad it helped you in some way. I do think it’d be worth contacting your GP however, or getting yourself one as they might be more helpful than you think! Hope you feel better soon hun!