Hi all, I’m really struggling now. I got diagnosed with MS 7 years ago. In that time it’s taken my ability to walk, my ability to write, and my ability to see. I’m 36 and housebound because I’ve lost my driving licence. I have no support network, and nobody to help me. I have carers twice a week and that is the only people that I see. I have secondary progressive MS, I’m struggling, and in the last couple of days my arms have got really weak and I can barely lift anything. I don’t know what to do or who to turn to.
I woke up last week with quite severe chest pains, but after a couple of hours they stopped. I rang 111 in the morning and my GP came to visit me. They both told me that if it happened again I would have to get urgent medical help and ring 999. Last night I woke up with the same chest pain. I didn’t ring the ambulance, because if I end up in hospital I have no way of getting back. The nearest hospital is 30 miles from here and I have no transport and no help so I will just be stuck there. I have no money to pay for a taxi. I’m really worried about myself now but there’s nothing that I can do. I have no friends in this area, and my family repeatedly let me down and I’m now at the point where I don’t want to ask them for help. I am on my own in the house and apart from my carer I see nobody. I am lonely and sad and I don’t know how long I can carry on with this. I don’t want to go onto antidepressants as I spent 6 years on them and I don’t see a sticking plaster as a solution to this problem which I will have to live with forever. I’ve also been on the council housing list for 2 years in the highest band I can be waiting for a wheelchair-accessible home. They’ve told me that I’m waiting for somebody to die and that in the meantime I just have to manage. I struggle around on my feet and it hurts, it takes a very long time, and I’m really sick of it now. Because of the length of time it get takes me to get anywhere on my home I frequently wet myself and soil myself because I can’t get to the bathroom. I don’t feel like I’m thriving, I’m basically surviving and and it’s making me miserable.
If anyone wants to be my friend, I’m 36, I’m a nice person and I need people to talk to. Thank you for listening