We got our dog Ben from a rescue home when he was one…he’s 10 now. He is big, red and fluffy and well loved by everyone who knows him.
Last year he had an operation for a Liposarcoma (tumour) under his left shoulder. Unfortunately, its returned…which is quite common for these type of tumours. After a long discussion with the vet, we’ve decided, no more intervention…he told us another operation would be more traumatic for Ben.
We took Ben for a review to the vets monday because the tumour is growing fast and becoming ulcerated. We are controlling his pain though and he still enjoys going out and still enjoys a light diet.
We wanted to discuss with the vet about knowing when the time is right, when enough is enough for Ben. Our vet is a lovely man and talked about the affection he has for his own pets…this really helped us. He also asked us to think about what we would like to do afterwards…would we like to have Ben back for cremation. We don’t, because we believe, like humans that the spirit of our pets go on to a better place. We appreciate the the time and sensitivity he gave us.
I thought I would be the strong one asking all the questions but I was the one crying like a baby and leaving it all up to my husband. I’m crying now writing this but I want to share my feelings…I hope you guys with pets can understand how important our animal friends are to us.
Oh Noreen, my heart goes out to you. It is only recently I had a similar experience. Believe me your darling Ben will tell you when the time is right for him. I have only once had my dog’s ashes returned and for me it was too traumatic I have never done it again. I do have several dogs but losing one does not make it any easier, it alters everything. My thoughts are with you, your husband and Ben. Our dogs are more than animals, mine are the reason I get up every morning and the unconditional love they show is absolutely amazing. We owe so much to our wonderful four legged friends.
Hi Noreen, I know exactly how you feel.I lost my dog last year, a Westie, after 15 years. She was literally my life and followed me everywhere, but for some reason not my wife. We had her cremated and buried the ashes in the garden. I talk to her everyday and although she is not there as such, I still feel her presence occasionally and that is a comfort. Be strong, Trevor x
Hi Noreen, be brave - your wonderful Ben will let you know when his time is right. You will see when he starts to suffer too much. My lovely Trailer (son of Tractor, an adopted street dog - 18 years he died) was with me from 3 weeks old until he was 14. He had a large external tumor that was tested and didn’t give him much bother for a couple of years, then became ulcerated and caused him lots of distress. Took him to the Vet, X rays showed his body riddled with 14 more inside, so I took him for a long walk, back to the Vet (usually a bit scared, but jumped up on the table and laid down, I cuddled him, kissed his nose whilst the Vet put him out of his misery. He was peaceful, happy and calm. He was cremated, I didn’t want his ashes, wonderful memories of the most faithful friend ever. Still say hello to him every day for the last four years
Thank you for your lovely messages, they are very much appreciated.
When the time is right for Ben, Philip our vet said he will come to our home. This is a big relief for us…I was dreading the thought of that last drive.
Oh Noreen. I am so so sorry. You must be heartbroken. I know how much you love your beautiful dogs. We have had many conversations about our dogs. I truly understand how you feel. I had a similar thing with my beautiful Mika 18 months ago.
You will know when the time is right and Ben will let you know when he is ready for you to help him at the end. Bless Ben. I will be thinking of you all.
I don’t have pets of my own but I do understand how you feel. My parents had two lovely black cats (sisters) from when they first left their mother until they were 15. After mum died, Magic pined for her every day and stopped eating. A vet’s examination revealed cancer under her tongue and dad had to make the awful decision to have her put to sleep just a month later and just six months after he had lost mum. Just six months further on he lost Mystic to kidney failure. So he lost mum and both cats within a year. They were always mums cats more than his and I can’t help thinking that Magic especially couldn’t cope without mum and Mystic couldn’t cope without her sister.
Pets become part of the family, especially when you have them in the home for so long. They all have their funny little ways and I’m sure you will know when the time is right to say goodbye to Ben. He sounds like a beautiful dog and friend. I’m sure you will have lots of treasured memories.
I have had rescue dogs for 22 years all breeds and types.As I never had any children they are my life…I have all their ashes …people may think I am odd but your pets love you and never question you unlike many humans …I feel for you xxxx
Hi Noreen, i lost my beloved cat “Bunny” in December. She was very much loved and a big aprt of our family. I so feel your sadness and fear. In the end we decided to put an end to her suffering, it was a very hard decision and i felt so bad immediately afterwards, but now i realise she simply went to sleep with us at her side telling her we loved her, and it was the best thing for her.
We had her cremated and they gve us her ashes in a lovely wooden box with her name on which we have now buried in the garden in her favorite spot in the sun, She will always be with us in spirit and although i still miss her so very much i now do not regret giving her a peaceful and pain fre end to her life.
Be strong hun, ben will always be with you, if not in in life then in spirit and be sure that your gut instinct in whatever you decide to do will be the right one.
anyone with pets will empathise with you. I often say I have five children my three beautiful daughters, and my two golden retrievers called Sugar and Spice. (My poor husband not only is he living with four females, both dogs are litter sisters. So he has six females to cope with!)
You will be guided by Ben when the time is right, and you will be strong for him. What a lovely vet you have to come to your home when you need him.
Our lovely Vet and nurse came to our home today and put our beautiful dog Ben to sleep. We knew it was the right time for him…it was all very peaceful.
I just can’t stop crying…I’m going to miss him so much. Such a well behaved dog to the end.