Dear Sergio
As I said before, I am so bloody sorry you’ve had this diagnosis. Yes, MS is cr@p but doesn’t have the stigma attached to Syphilis. For some reason, that stigma has lasted throughout the centuries and I’m quite sure it makes you feel rather ‘grubby’, dirty and even guilty.
Again. IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT. It wouldn’t have been your fault if it was MS, and it’s not you fault now. Anymore than it would have been were it HIV. Anyone can catch a sexually transmitted disease. Anyone who has sex with other people that is (and that’s most of us). Having said that, bloody hell I wish I still had feeling down there and were still capable of it!!!
It’s a human thing. Unless you have sex with farmyard animals. Which is just wrong. (Apologies to anyone who has a ‘special friend’ who just happens to be of another species. Assuming it’s consensual!)
It bothers me slightly that you said you had a ‘bad conversation’ with your Sergio. I hope he’s not been a bad boyfriend. If he has and it was maybe early days, perhaps you can forgive him and move on? Regardless, I hope Sergio #2 gets tested. Don’t forget, if he’s negative, or even if he’s positive and hasn’t been unfaithful, either of you could have had it for years with no symptoms. Which would seem so unfair, if it’s a later stage; that you do maybe now have neurosyphilis and that possibly not all the symptoms will go once you have cleared the infection from your system.
I really hope this isn’t going to cause major disruptions for you and your Sergio. He’s such as beautiful boy (as are you) and I know you love each other. I dearly hope you can get beyond this infection and stay together.
Meanwhile, there’s the lumbar puncture. Regardless of it not being MS they’re looking for, this webpage still applies as it’s the same procedure: Lumbar puncture | MS Trust The general rule is to relax about the procedure. To make sure you are able to stay laying down for a good long time after the test (a couple of hours), drink lots of caffeinated liquid after the test (full sugar coke with a bendy straw so you can lay down flat while drinking) and then rest at home.
The attitude of the medical profession is horrible. Try not to let them get to you. Decent people do not behave like that. Kind, generous people will treat all others as human beings and not judge them for an infection that’s in no way caused by your sexuality, the kind of sex you do or don’t have or the gender of your partner. Heterosexuals can get syphilis too. And decent people, regardless of gender or sexuality will treat you the same way regardless of how you live your life or your sexual orientation.
I really feel for you, my dear friend Sergio. I’m happy that you don’t have MS and that your infection is curable with penicillin. I do hope sincerely that there’s no long term effects from it.
Love Sue 
x
loud and clear. IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT!!!