I just want to put my feelings in writing more than anything else(but any advice/comments are much appreciated as i am still very new to all of this) - good therapy I think.
I was dx on 22 August 2012 (a day will NEVER forget) and i apparently have had MS since year 2000. Over the last couple of years things took a downturn hence the diagnosis - won’t bore you with the details).
Anyway, the last couple of weeks have been bad for me - for once in my life, when people have asked are you ok, I have actually said ‘you know what, NO’. Went to see my MS nurse today for a routine appointment and told her what had been happening over the last couple weeks - fall at work through tripping over nothing, numbness in left arm and leg, not being able to do ‘starjumps’ at my martial arts training cos I couldn’t literally pick my feet off the floor, an overwhelming need to wee (not able to ‘hold on’ for a bit like normal) and th most HORRENDOUS back spasm on Sunday which left me ringing for emergency GP and being given diazapam (mopping a floor and obviously took it too far after feeling an initial ‘twinge’ - I’m still learning when to stop lol)
After explaining all of this, I was told to rest immediately and within four hours I have a prescription for pregablin and an urgent appoint with neuro at his ‘private’ (unoffcial) clinic on Sunday at 8.30am as she fears I am teetering on the edge of another relapse. I am really still new to all this so it’s been somewhat overwhelming 
I love my martial arts training and am due to take my blackbelt test in December, and am worried that I won’t be able to do it, even though they know all about my dx and have adapted my training
I am also pi**ed off that I cannot do things like I used to like doing my ironing in one go with feeling like cr@p for the next week
Just totally in a bad place. Anyway, the good thing is that my 7 year son is entering his first mrtial arts competition tomorrow so I will hopefully be a proud mummy 