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things are just getting worse

My mother in law is even worse, this heat in the carehome is just not helping either and thats with fans too. She is very very very distressed, calling out in constant pain I just cannot understand it I thought morphine was supposed to stop any pain but even whens shes had her dose shes still in pain and shes on a high dose of it every 4 hours!, shes boiling hot to touch, shes complaining with her stomach (which is really swollen) they turn the peg feed off to see if that helps but nothing seems to work, all you here the whole time you visit her is help me!! help me!! im scared im scared!! but there is sod all we can do it is distressing for us as much as it is for her, she is very chesty again but the doctor said that will always be the same and that its her ms just getting even worse, hes said she can go in hospital but she is refusing!! feel like im at my wits end as I have to look after my husband (her son) each and every time he visits as he just cannot hack it, we have two beautiful boys( her granchildren) who have never seen there nan well, and its very distressing for them to see her like this too, if there was a god he would not let this continue how can someone be put through this much pain, but its not just the person with ms it affects, its everyone around who has to watch and feel completley helpless. Feel like we have hit an all time low dont know what to do anymore

Hi, oh dear, what an awfully sad situation you are all in.

Do you feel the care home is not taking your ma in law`s problems seriously enough?

Is the doctor you mention her, GP or one used by the home?

Sounds like perhaps a second opinion would help.

I`m sorry but I dont know what else to suggest.

luv Pollx

Hi. I’m with Poll on this. I’d demand a second opinion, get your husband to talk her into going into hospital. No one should have to suffer pain. I was until recently a nurse and what you’re describing sounds very much like something I saw only once but it was very distressing for me. A patient I had was also on morphine and it made her entire body hyper sensitive. She didn’t even want clothes on because even her skin hurt. Nobody I worked with had ever experienced this kind of reaction before, we were just lucky that the GO phoned the Mac Millan doctor as they specialize in pain control and even he’d only seen it once or twice before, that’s how rare it is.

I’m not saying that is definitely what is happening, morphine is usually very effective, but she might need another type of painkiller. Whatever they do though has to be an improvement. There is no excuse for anyone to suffer with pain, it’s just finding what works for her.

The hardest part I imagine will be getting her to agree with getting the care and treatment she needs. I hope you can manage to get this under control. Please keep us posted.

Min x

Hey I have ms and I was looking on all the forums hope you don’t mind But if your mother in law suffers from ms normal painkillers don’t work as its her brain thats telling her she’s in pain. You should try and get her on specialised ms painkillers (im sorry I dont know there proper name). They should help as thry treat the problem and not just the pain her brain is telling get she is feeling. I hope that this gets sorted as I know the pain a family can go through due the effects of ms and how helpless yous must feel at this time. I send my blessings to you and your family Tasha x

Sorry to hear about your mum in laws suffering,my wife has similar syptoms ,I find she gets constipated 2wks plus ,her muscles dont work she gets sore every time ,.She needs help going ,are the nurses following her bowel movments, liquid feed can be too low or high in fibre ,are the dieticians up to date on your mum in laws feed. my wife chokes in the upright position due to sylavia swallowing problems ,she has a peg,moving her reguarly stops chest infections I think ,is your mum in law moved reguarly ? Im sure all of above has been checked but ,also prozac and gabapentin helped and regular paracetamol ,want to help ,hope things get better ,fr

Thank you all for your replys unfortunately my mother in law passed away last night, her throat closed up and she had a bad chest infection she was unconscious and seemed pain free, I hope she is in heaven now away from all the suffering she went through with this awful disase :-(( r.i.p anne till we meet again

I am so sorry to read the sad news of Anne’s passing. You and your husband wanted the best treatment for her and tried your hardest for her, but if she refused hospital then it was her decision. My husband was exactly the same, although he was here with me at home. He passed peacefully too. I hope your husband can feel comforted in that she is out of the terrible pain now, and that you both did your very best for her. My thoughts and good wishes are with you both xxx

Oh Helen, I have only just seen your sad news and am so sorry. It is a great shame that her last days were in such a poor state. I hope time will allow you to remember the good times. Best wishes to your hubby too.

luv Pollx