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mother in law ms

Hi im new to this, but came on here as im really worried over everything you see my mother-in-law has had ms since she was 40, she is coming up to her 60th birthday in June unfortunatley she gets worse by the day she is in full time nursing home now, has lost her eyesight, bedridden and in alot of pain she is pegfed, and sufferers with constant chest infections she has pnemonia christmas and we nearly lost her but she battles on, she has had enough of life now and crys most of the times we see her, I feel so badly for her and wish there is something we can say but everything we do seem to says sets her off as its all things she wont ever be able to do again :-(, then there is my husband her son he struggles very badly seeing his mother like this and gets very depressed everytime we visit, she has a bad chest and is coughing up alot of phelm which my husband is very tickled stomached and can not handle either, its a bad situation all round I wish there was a cure for this horrible diesase, I wish we new what to say to her without putting our foot in it but it all seems so hard to talk about our lifes when hers is so terribly sad, Im sad for my husband watching his mother like this and im so sad for her being stuck in her body :frowning:

Hi. Sounds horrendous and I guess here’s nothing you can do apart from supprt your husband and mother in law through this and unfortunately I guess it will be very hard on you. I have no advice but am thinking of you at this tough tie!

thank you

Hi, I am so sorry to hear how badly affected your mum in law is.

And at 60…crikey! My age.

She is very young to be in a home and as ill as she is.

Now i am not a medical professional, but if anyone stays in bed a lot, they do get fluid on their lungs, which is hard to shift.

Is it possible to get her up, into a wheelchair and maybe take her for some fresh air in the home`s gardens?

That`s about the best advice I can offer.

luv Pollx

She is very young and over the years has gone downhill fast, they have tried putting her in her chair but she is in pain within 10 mins of being in there and very uncomfortable that she does not want to try it anymore, she is on more morphine now and counts down the hours mins seconds till her next dose

Hi again.

I am so sorry to hear that. I dont know what else to suggest.

luv Pollx

Sadly Helen I can see this happening to my wife, she’s only 45 but has had SPMS since she was 21 and in the last 10 years has really gone downhill :frowning:

I think the only thing you can do is be there for your husband when he is struggling, seeing your parents suffer is horrible.

My father died at 61 from bone cancer, I still miss him every day 15 years later although it sounds corny he was my best mate & last year my mother went through breast cancer, mastectomy & chemo. She’s now in full remission so I’m treating her to a holiday over the next two weeks.

I’m afraid despite being a 6’3” lump of a bloke I cry at the slightest sad thing so perhaps just give your husband the chance to cry and hold him will help?

thanks for the responses, nigel so sorry to that you are going through this with you wife it really is soul destroying and thanks for the advice, my hubby really does struggle he is on anxiety tablets now as things just seem to get worse im hoping this helps him a little obvoiusly never going to ease the pain of seeing his mom like this but to make this a but more bearable for the time been however long she may have left.