starting to let it go

After 17 years of NOT playing squash I finally chucked away my racquet and eye protectors.

Even prior to my 1991 diagnosis I was no great shakes as a player, but it allowed me to hit things hard and be a player.

I only just worked out that it is pretty unlikely that I will play again, I might just lob the old hiking boots as well and make space for the more frequently used stuff. My last “proper” walk was in 2008, I remember how shattered I was.

Fortunately I have now got a Tramper and can still visit loads of the old trails.

Best foot (?) forward and all that.


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I really feel for you, Mick. It just hurts, that kind of thing. However sensible, however practical and realistic a person is, however good at enjoying the glass-half-full in life - that kind of thing just hurts!



I feel it too Mick. I soon realised I wouldn’t be needing my new ish hiking boots. No more stomping on a nearby shingle beach for me now,something I loved to do whatever the weather. I gave them to my niece who had just started an outdoor activities course. My boots have been rock climbing and mountaineering, kayaking and rambling. They’re having a wonderful time! Yesterday I signed my car over to my husband. He was insistant in buying a Fiat Doblo with a drop down ramp last year. It will be handy he said, to roll in the manual wheelchair and rollator. Within a month of buying it, I wasn’t able to drive. Now it makes life easier for him to get the motorised chair in and out. Indeed, best foot forward…

Hello Mick.

I too have a Tramper. I’ve done loads of local exploring. Unfortunately it’s becoming a bit of a luxury as my needs change and lifestyle develops. I’m now more of a train and bus person, spanning the country as a new independent traveller.

As our beast develops we need to adapt to overcome new barriers and challenges.

Let’s just keep pushing that joystick forward.


It comes to us all. I got rid of my ‘going in the sea’ rubber shoes a few years ago. On a nice day I’m so envious of people in the water.

Obviously I had to get rid of all my girly high heels a long time ago. Not that I wore them often, but now and then. Plus my favourite boots because they were too heavy to wear. Even just to sit in a wheelchair. How on earth did I ever wear them all day long?

And as for nice clothes that are now several sizes too small. It nearly broke my heart to give away my favourite Karen Millen dress.

Mind you Mick, I think 17 years is a long time to keep unused squash kit! But I totally understand why it took that long. I don’t think I’d worn my favourite dress for at least 10 years and I only gave it away a few months ago.


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I’m so sorry to read your news Mick. I used to love walking, anywhere, then back again and another route. I used to borrow neighbours’ dogs to walk because walking is even better with three dogs in tow. We shall have to settle for our memories now, but wasn’t it great? I sometimes wonder if there ever might be a cure for MS. If there was, the first thing I would do would be to climb Ben Nevis again!


Hi Mick,

I have a suit of oilskins hanging up in a wardrobe and a pair of blue wellies in the shed. The last time I was able to wear them was five years ago, on a sailing ship called Tenacious, that is designed for people with disabilities.

I was saying to someone, only this week, that I would spend more time getting in and out of these cloths now than I would have on deck having fun.

But I still have my Yachtmaster Certificate. Even MS can’t take that away from me.

Best wishes,


thanks Alison, when it starts to hurt I realise how lucky I have been to enjoy the things I did.


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Cheers Poppy,

So glad to hear that the boots have been involved in interesting stuff.



Trains and bus’s and independent travel, let me know when you start to slow down, sounds like a blast.



OK I am busted,I was not actively holding on to my squash kit, there might have been an element of laziness or inertia. But lobbing it and my walking boots did feel like letting something significant go.

The very idea of footwear without velcro is alarming.


But at least you’re getting handsomer every day - some consolation, perhaps?


Thanks Moira,

Indeed memories are great, I go back to a 2 day hike with my wife across the Swiss national park, bloomin’ brilliant.

And Ican still get out with her now on my Tramper, building new memories.

I even get to race with other peoples dogs at the beach, a bit childish but great fun.


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Ta Alison, I can see that you believe that personal grooming is important too. AD

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Thank you Anthony,

I have a certificate from “The bike experience” who put disabled motorcyclists back on motorbikes. One of the biggest laughs was getting fat disabled old gits into one piece racing leathers.

My MS can not take away these brilliant things, so the boots and racquet are of little consequence.


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Brill! I’ll give them a ring in the morning. I can relive my glory days of tearing through Portsmouth on a Honda 70.

I crewed on Tenacious back in 2003 and the only other disabled person on board was gluten intolerant, so not exactly half the crew. Still, it was a fantastic experience, if extremely hard work.

don’t knock a C70, a bike is a bike (unless it is a Honda CX650 turbo or Ducati 906 Paso)

I had a few grins on my C50

M (still a biker,in my head and still smiling after my TBEX day out)

I am Glad to hear of your fun with the bike experience.

I first came across them at castle combe about 5 or 6 years ago when i was doing a wed track day,and they were set up at the back paddock doing their their thing in morning before getting out on track at lunchtime. As a biker and ex racer as well as a step father to a disabled child(at that time,now in 20’s!) i was really amazed and impressed by them, think its grown a bit now?.Makes my borrowing a trike off a mate to give our daughter a “biking experience” a bit rubbish!

The guy who set it up has actually managed to get his race license despite his disability and been racing with thundersport last few years. I was there for last 4 years helping a friend out who started racing, had to tell my friend the end of last season that i couldn’t carry on as i am needed more at home with the wife now having MS,she said i should carry on but regularly disappearing thursday lunchtime and getting back very late sunday seems unreasonable!


It’s just so hard letting go of things that remind us of our pre MS or early MS time.

Im like Sue, no high heels. Dresses don’t fit. Charity shops near me are doing very well.

Still got my motorbike leathers mind, and my boots. Kawasaki gpz 550, I’m only 5’3" belt driven so clean! Lived in London sold it in 1993. Must pass on my kit too.

Happy memories.


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