Starting a family

Hi everyone

I hope your all keeping as well as can be

I have a question I really don’t know how to put it I hope you all understand why I went anonymous

Me and my girlfriend have been together for over a year but the sex life isn’t good its great in every way and she’s say’s it doesn’t matter to her but It matters to me I can please her in so my ways in bed but I can’t get an erection and when I do it doesn’t last very long well not long enough and no where near long enough to cum I went to my gp first he gave me Viagra but all that seemed to do was giving me a pumping heart and sore head then he tried me on 10mg of Cialis that didn’t really work either it showed a little promise but not what I hoped for I went back again and he gave me 20mg of Cialis but still no joy when I do feel like I’m getting anywhere close to cumming my leg goes into a spasm and that puts an end to it we could live with me not being able to cum but we both would really love to try for a baby but I don’t know what else I can do or which road to take my girlfriend says she doesn’t mind but I just know she‘d love a baby with me I had just got used to not having children but that was before I met these wonderful woman and I‘m so happy.

I’d really love some advice If anyone can. Sorry for going anonymous but Its hard to talk about and I don’t like to bother my gp again, sometimes it gets me down, I know there are more things to worry about I’ve got my head round and can live with the way I am now with MS its just I’d like a family one day

Hi I can totally relate to this. I’m female with ms and intercourse is very painful for me. We are both young and have no children. Sex is non existent for us at the moment because of this problem, I’m scared I will never be able to have children because we can’t go through with the complete act so to speak because it is so painful. My partner is desperate for kids too, I don’t know what will happen. I’m sorry I can’t give you any answers but I hope you do get something sorted out soon x


I’m in a similar boat to you - unable to ejaculate but wanting to start a family soon. However, I was referred by my GP to the NHS clinic in my area that deals with all aspecrs of sexual health. They did a blood test which showed my testosterone levels were low, so I was prescribed with a gel to use every day, and I’ve found that’s helped my sex drive. But also at the clinic they have a special vibrator for men, which they reckon can induce ejaculation, even if you’re not, er, ‘feeling’ it, if you know what I mean : ).

I’ve not tried it yet, but I’ve got an appointment next month to have a go & see how I get on with it. But they also said I could just get a standard mens vibrator from somewhere like Ann Summers. They said it won’t be as good as their one, but no harm in trying.

I hope we’re both able to do the deed at some point in the future.

Hi Anon, you could talk initially to your GP about your specific difficulties. We were recommended a number of things. We have used a vacuum pump for penetration-takes a bit of practice this is not great for ejaculation. We ended up at clinic but the sperm count was low, that was because of using testogel! The upshot was testogel was stopped and they just gave us loads of little jars and syringers. It was sort of clinical but it did the trick.

Keep going-good lick.

Thanks for your replies everyone I’m going away on holiday in June with my girl I’m always at my best MS wise in warm sunny weather and if things don’t happen while on holiday I’ll go back to my gp and seek some help my girlfriend isn’t putting any pressure or anything on me we both love children and it would be nice to have our own she keeps telling me there’s ways and means I really hope so

Can you get an erection when masturbating? If so, masturbate until you are about to climax and then penetrate your partner. Just a thought. If you can’t, then I don’t know what to suggest? Back to your GP? I hope that the sun and relaxation of your holiday helps. It helps not to put too much pressure on yourself. Good luck.

I understand why you went anonymous and completely agree with your reasons for doing so. But remember, there’s no shame in this. It can be a symptom of this awful condition. My wife is great too and so understanding, but sometimes I feel less of a man. But I’m still me. And when the mood takes me, can still be quite funny (although not in Wb’s league).

I can’t get an erection when masturbating I can’t even masturbate when where having sex and the very odd time I feel like I’m close to climaxing my leg goes into a spasm and just kills the moment :frowning:

My girlfriend says I’m still all man and never puts me under any pressure but I can’t help feeling useless at times I know that we’d both love a baby maybe one day it will work for me