So Ive been in a new job for the last six months, it involves a long commute - 1 hr 20 mins each way, is really stressful and the hours are really long - 10 jours a day bolted to a desk/terminal. Needless to say in these conditions I am not performing very well. They ratcheted up the pressure at the end of my 6 month probation, giving me daily negative feedback about performance and then called a meting with HR etc and told me they were extending my probation by four months, adding that they dont normally do this and that I shld be gratfeul.
That was four weeks ago. Last Friday night my right leg buckled under me on the way up the stairs and the all too familiar impossible to lift your leg/foot feeling was back.
Now, I was diagnosed five years ago, have been on copaxone ever since and havent had a single relapse in all that time. My first attack - ie pre MS diagnosis - was a big spinal cord lesion that paralysed my right leg. the second was a third nerve palsy that made me almost comically cross-eyed like the old bloke off the Laurel and Hardy films.
The feeling or lack thereof I got last friday was just like when I got out of hospital after the first attack, and before I started rehab. I regained 100 percent of the feeling, strength and motion of my right leg and right eye btw.
So this week I took some time off work to recover, have an MRI and see my neuro. He didnt put me on steroids and was pretty possitive even though my leg was getting worse. The MRI came back today and its amazing news, the 40 or so little lesions in my brain have almost all gone!! the big one on my spine is reduced in size by more than 40 percent, and all the others are in his words “fading” I am over the moon.
so he says the stress of my new job caused a “phantom” exacerbation and that I have to change my sittuation drastically or it will get worse and worse. Its such a bummer to be told hey, your MS is getting better, which is really unusual, except you are f**ing it up with your job.
My employer doesnt know I have MS. I now have to tell them as I have sick notes from this week. There are some things I can do to improve my sittuation, working from an office much nearer my home that is away from my team, which will enable me to rest/exercise more is the main one. But I am not sure how they will react to the news while I am on probation.
Any advice? sorry I know its a bit rambly ond long and I should be really grateful that I am doing so well. But at the same time I havent been worse in 5 years. Does that make sense to anyone?