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So embarrised

They say pride comes before a fall… I must have had it coming …I foolishly agreed to go out with Molly (Autistic daughter) to see" Shaun the Sheep"… it seemed like a good idea i had my Carer and so we set off with Molly, her sister Isabelle and her friend it was all going so well we managed to get on the bus, struggled a bit with the wheelchair…I was never good at reversing even when i could drive but i managed to get in the right place with a bit of backward and forwards and even made room for Frazer (assistance dog) eventually got there… film was good Molly behaved …Smuggley thought i’d Nailed this! How wrong was I…Coming back the bus station was packed and Molly did her worst needless to say i had an angry crowd of pensioners giving her the evils and muttering loudly…The bus finally came but this time it was full …and much to my horror it all went terribly wrong I got well and truly Wedged, I couldn’t go backwards or forward iv’e not been so embarrassed in a long time, Thankfully a Kind man gave me a huge push and managed to get in the disabled place and hung my head as i had to face all those pensioners while Molly sat merrily on the back seat shouting insults at me.

Well she’s back to school monday! … I think next time i’ll give the bus a miss

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Michelle, you’d think someone who’d been on the earth for such a long time might have shown a bit more understanding. Perhaps they were of the right wing tabloid reading variety! The last time I had people tutting at me I just looked up and said “cabaret’s over”. This encouraged a lot of looking away. Nevertheless, it’s really hard when you know you’ve done your best to get out and be a mum with your daughter. Hopefully next time it will run more smoothly.

Best wishes, Steve x.

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Hi there,

What is it with pensioners? I work in a supermarket and I come out of my office to stagger with my crutch to the loo now and again and it’s always a pensioner who stares or makes some silly comment.

I was finished work one afternoon just sitting on the wall waiting for my friend to take her car over, when an old man says to me

’ is it arthritis? " looking at my leg. No says I, ms. Oh! Says the man that’s the one they say its all in your head.

Couldnt say anything as I was brought up to respect old people.

Never mind these ignorant people, you had a lovely day out until things went a bit haywire. Be proud! It takes a lot of guts to go on a bus in a wheelchair.

You really do get your eyes opened when you become disabled.

Mags xx

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Well done you, don’t let them put you off some people are just plain ignorant.

Jan x

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Well done Michelle! You deserve a medal!

As Steve says for people that have been around all those years they should know better! Don’t let the likes of those ignorant people put you off. Seems to me you’re doing a grand job, being a mum is hard at the best of times, you’ve Mollies autism and a wheelchair to cope with…they should be cheering you on not tutting!

Take care of yourself,

Nina x

Michelle no matter what they say, I take my hat off to you. To get out with your girls is not the easiest thing to do yet you seem to take it all in your stride. I think that’s the sign of a good loving mum and I’m sure they enjoyed the day out. Molly isn’t a healthy child, and believe me, enough of them play their mothers up. Ask any of us and we’ll tell you they all throw tantrums at times. She really can’t help it. I imagine she was probably stressed with the crowd of people.

Don’t let one excursion put you off, I think you’re doing fantastically well. Good on you!!

Cath x

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dont let them ignorant oaps put you off going out,

get an up-yer-kilt sticker(2 tarten fingers) and put it on back of your w/c,

ive got one for back of my scooter and it makes me chuckle.

J x

Thanks, everyone, I really appreciate your kind words… for years i have had to put up with disaproving looks unforunately Autistic spectrum disorders run in our family , my older daughter is Autistic too and my son has Aspergers a form of Autism, so i am quite thick skinned and keep a sense of humour try to see the funny side of things. We actually have 7 children…and the others are wonderful rounded out polite young adults our youngest daughter is 12 and she’s great …so I know that its not bad parenting. I think since Iv’e become disabled its become so much harder, physically i can’t do what I used to. i was always very active. Most of our children have grown up and moved out now so its not so bad. Lee’s brillant he works full time but he does a lot with them when he’s not working.

I have to say although you get some difficult people most people are lovely and will do whatever they can to help, it must have just been a bad day.

Michelle x

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Thanks Robin, I had to laugh at the old man in your message, iv’e had similar said to me by my neighbor, an older lady across the road… I don’t know how they think these comments up. Like you i just smile sweetly and say nothing.

Michelle x

Robin, I am gobsmacked that someone said ms is all in yor head! The ignorant rude so and so!

Grrrr.

Shelley, I know what you feel like when just moving in a wheelchair becomes a cabaret show for some rude people.

I had a bad experience on a bus once, when I finally got into the right position and had to sit facing everyone.

Sometimes a pathetic smile makes THEM turn away.

I couldnt wait to get off.

pollx

Robin (and everyone) a friend of mine said to me recently you should always say Multiple Sclerosis and not MS as many people confuse MS and ME (although saying that makes me very sorry for people with ME which is not all in the head either).

Shelley, With all you’re dealing with I think you should get a medal. Giving you a virtual applause. Bravo!!! Keep your chin up and don’t let the bas*ards grind you down.

Pat xx

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Thanks for the message Poll

I’m glad that you know what i mean, why do they design buses like that with that big pole in the wrong place so you can’t back in without having to get everyone to move or ripping into the seats with the footrests… I sometimes think that they just want to tick boxes to say that the buses are wheelchair accessible…thankfully my carer asked a stubborn old lady to move so i could get the turning circle right.

You know I try so hard to be plucky especially for my childrens sake but sometimes i’m so exhausted by the effort, what makes me the saddest is when Isabelle my daughter gets embarrassed shes only 12 and she really feels it My other daughter Molly is very loud because of her Autism so i feel for Isabelle she has a lot to put up with she’s such a lovely daughter she really cares, one time when my wheelchair mounted a grass verge and i nearly fell out we were both crying. She’s better since wev’e got the Assistance dog because people are a lot nicer and when her friends come out with us they all love Frazer its amazing what a difference he’s made…I had stopped being adventurous and rarely went out before having him, iv’e only had him since November and I feel like iv’e got my life back!

Michelle x

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Thanks for your kind words Pat and everyone else… All these lovely messages keep me going… and i was having a weepy day today. I feel better all ready.

Michelle x

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Thanks Cath,

I know its not easy for lots of us I read on one of your posts that your daughter was not well, i meant to reply but its a few days ago. i hope things are okay for you. Thanks for your kind words.

Love Michelle x

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Hello Michelle.

It’s really encouraging and inspiring to see the obvious care you have for your children. Towards the end of my teaching I had the absolute pleasure and privilege of teaching three year six autistic/asperger’s spectrum children in three successive years. They were completely different and gave me such an insight into their ways of processing thoughts and information. To my surprise and admiration, they were given lots of support from their own classmates. They were three very memorable years.

Steve x

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[quote=“Snow Leopard”]

Robin (and everyone) a friend of mine said to me recently you should always say Multiple Sclerosis and not MS as many people confuse MS and ME (although saying that makes me very sorry for people with ME which is not all in the head either).

Shelley, With all you’re dealing with I think you should get a medal. Giving you a virtual applause. Bravo!!! Keep your chin up and don’t let the bas*ards grind you down.

Pat xx

[/quote] You know what Pat, I usually do say multiple sclerosis but that particular day I was absolutely exhausted and to be honest couldn’t be bothered striking up a conversation. I could have cried but was too tired to do even that.

I can see the funny side now.

Mags xx

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Thanks Steve,

Thats a lovely message, and so lovely to hear of your experience in teaching children on the Autistic spectrum, I am always humbled by watching my own children they are often so plucky my son with aspergers is very clever he doesn’t have learning difficulties like Molly and Rosanna in some ways its harder for him people don’t always understand him and he can feel very sad… He doesn’t realise how talented he is his piano playing is beautiful.

Michelle x

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