This is such a sad story in so many ways.
Sad that she felt shame about claiming the benefits she was entitled to, and sad that she wasn’t able to access any treatment to keep her pain at bay, and sad that her life ended so young, and alone.
Very Sad Indeed
yep-so sad. but i totally get it.
i was diagnosed in 2005 too. working, bringing up my 4 kids, driving, living a full and great life.
now i am dependent on benefits and carers to assist me with basic daily activities-a total lifestyle change.
i have asked myself why do i bother? but then its easy to come up reasons why i do. until u r in such a position its impossible to know what u would do. i know folk can consider/ponder what options they may choose but theres a huge difference between theory and reality.
for folk that have read any of my posts thats why i feel so strongly re making my mind strong despite my body (carcass) failing me in so many ways…
keep strong, dont fight, accept and cope as best as u can-find ur truth and ur way then u cant go wrong…
ellie x
Yes this is sad. I now know that status and enjoying a rewarding new career in academia will not be availble to me. I have had good jobs and bad (was cabin attendent for 3.5 years which I didn’t much enjoy, secretary, administrator, university student. I am just going to have to find a way to deal with it and hopefully my nervous system will go easy on me. But in a way it leaves me free to get on with being creative like writing music, painting and drawing. I used to always want to unleash my creativity at some point. Thanks chocorange. for the wise words.
xxx
I so get where this lady is coming from. I don’t have an MS diagnosis (still being investigated by neuro) but I do have another long standing incurable condition and live in constant pain which my cocktail of drugs barely keeps at bay. Pretty much every bit of me is affected: skin, joints, heart, digestion. I have had multiple surgeries with more in the pipeline. I am ‘lucky’ - others with the condition have very limited like expectancy and live their short lives on TPN and bedbound. At times it can feel like I am defined by illness - my dreams put away in tissue paper and spontaneity gone. The career path I chose, worked hard for and excelled at, abandoned. Each day you plod on and survive but one of my reassurances is that the route she took still remains an option. I may never take this route but I cope by knowing it is there.
It makes me angry that we do not have a more compassionate approach to end of life decision making in the UK and very sad that people like this lady die alone and with stigma.
It was sad to read that she planned her final journey alone
I worked hard as a mature student to get into nursing. I had to give my career up in 2006/7 through ill health before being diagnosed with ms last year.
I am concerned about how my life will end but never had the urge to end it…not yet anyway.
I’ve been on my own spiritual journey for quite a while now and see my life as a series of challenges. I actually enjoy being challenged, which is a good job considering all the stuff I’ve had to struggle with I like happy challenges too
Its hard to explain but no matter what is happening in my life, there is always a light inside me. As long as it stays lit, I’m good to go
It’s very sad and I think it’s extremely sad that finances and pride were part of it. I don’t think money or career is ever something anybody should worry about to such an extent that they end their lives. Life on benefits is hard but nothing to be ashamed of and certainly money is never worth the cost of a life.
I can imagine living in constant pain is awful and would eventually become intolerable for many especially if there was no way to relieve that.
very sad story and we’ll have the usual folk on saying that she was wrong and she should have pulled herself together - “my mum/dad/sister has MS and its not that bad” - This lady was very brave and her choice was her choice and who are we to judge…God bless her soul…
that was very sad for me reading that. such a brave woman to do something like that.
god bless her.
Oh dear, yes it was a very sad story.
The life she led was admirable, but one or two things bothered me.
She said she relied on family to boost her income, as she wouldnt want to apply for benefits (which she was fully entitled to), as if it was a socially bad thing to do. Thousands of us rely on benefits. I feel no embarrassment at doing so.
She also said she was not committing suicide…well she took her own life, so surely she was committing suicide…
im gonna shut up here, cos I dont wish to sound mean about the lady.she was a marvel!
maybe if shed had children, she wouldve felt she had more to stick around for.
I hope no-one takes offence at my words…sorry if that it so…
luv Pollx
Hello,
I am in the early stages of the same situ as she was in. I have lost my job due to ms, i have no access to a ms nurse that will answer the phone or even give you an app.
I have to wait 6-12 months to see a neuro in the hope they will help.
When my bowel, bladder, mobillity and pain get to the point she found herself in, what else can we do when their is no help?
Darren
Yes, very sad story indeed.
It must be so hard if you are on your own. Many of us have family and/or friends to help us, but this is not the case for many. High functioning, driven and successful individuals, in particular, would probably struggle dealing with the loss of control more than others. And if they live on their own and have few, if any, significant others, as appears to be the case here, then tragedy is often more likely than amongst those who don’t live on their own.
A very sad reminder about the grim reality of MS, as much as a sad reflection on how society is becoming increasingly atomised. No matter how successful, clever, happy, and sorted someone may appear on the outside, on the inside they may well be crushingly lonely.
Hello, it is sad, a waste of a life, for anyone who ends their life prematurely, this woman had lived her life-I presume-to the full as how she wanted it, we work, pay taxes, insurances, etc, so that, if unfortunate, we need to use the paid for benefits, I am 100% in agreement with Poll, this woman thought it was beneath her, an embarrassment, undignified, to ask for benefits, but she thought nothing of taking money from family members, doesn’t add up, and what is it, when a person ends his/her life, if not suicide, Brian
You have not offended me at all Poll. I truly understand both sides.
It was the lady’s decision whether to end her own life or carry on with the fight and as we all know it is a fight.
I could never consider it personally as I couldn’t put my family (espcially hubby and sons) through the pain of losing me but I do understand how she came to her decision which is a very personal one.
Shazzie xx