Pushing him away

I am currently being tested for MS and the whole process is taking its toll on my mental health. I posted on here a few weeks ago as I was an emotional wreck and things seem to have gone from bad to worse. I seem to have sunk into a state of depression which is stupid when I dont even have a diagnosis. And now I think my brain has got so tired of stressing about the possiblity of Ms that I have found something completely irrational to focus on. I now push my partner away and have convinced myself that there is something wrong with our relationship when really in my heart I know that he is the one person I need right now. Until this we had such a perfect life together and my god damn mental health is spoiling it. Has anyone else experienced this??? Is it normal to push him away? I just want my life back