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partner has ms

Need advice please. My partner and I have been together 3 yrs and have a 1 year old together, found out he had ms at the same time as i found out I was pregnant. When we met everything was great was so happy felt loved and special until now, and it’s the opposite feels like I’m forever walking on egg shells and I love him so much, but it’s killing me now. When things are ok its good but when they not is like he’s trying to hurt me and physically break me. 1 min he’ll tell me he loves me then he can’t even bring himself to say to it, tells me that maybe best we break up and whatever i say he gets angry, I don’t know from1 day to the next the mood he’ll be in our even if we r ok as a couple or not, it’s only directed at me nobody else. We don’t live together but I travel 40 miles every week to stay with him 2 nights. I don’t want to walk away but he’s making it hard for me to want to stay as much asi love him. Is this normal with people with ms please help.

It doesn’t sound like he has come to terms with having MS himself yet, does he have a MS nurse he is in contact with? Pushing you away could just be his way of trying to save you from the uncertainty of what may lie ahead. You love him, though, and have a child together so it must be worth trying to make it work out. I don’t know how you would get him to do it, but he needs to discuss how he feels with someone, his nurse or even one of the helplines (bottom of this page is a free phone number).

I hope you can work through this.

Yes he does but he doesn’t tell her the exact problem I know that much.Thank you

Hi, I feel so sorry that you are going through this, but it is very understandable.

Keeping a relationship going in the right direction, can be a difficult task when severe illness isnt included in the mix, so when it does join in, different people react in different ways.

I have been married 41 years and when I became disabled, it tugged and pulled at us. I felt my hubby wouldnt be able to cope,. He kept his feelings bottled up,as is his usual way to dealing with everything.

I neeeded to be re-assured, to be told, he would always love me and be there for me.

He did tell me all these things, then he got ill too and life is really difficult at times.

Now back to you…as your relationship hasnt got so many miles on the clock, perhaps your fella feels you are young and could find another bloke to share your life with. Yes, I know you think that is rediculous, but this sort of thing does happen…a lot…when one partner thinks he or she is holding the other back, spoiling plans for the future. So although they love their partner with all their heart, they try to push them away, to save them from being hurt.

Your chap needs to know you will love him whatever happens as regards his health…in sickness and in health, married or not.

I think he needs counselling, as an outsider can say things close friends or family would be scared to say.

I wonder if writing your man a letter would help? Putting all your feelings down on paper just might tell him your love is forever.

I truly hope things get better for you all.

luv Pollx

Hi new here. My partner was diagnosed in 2006. We have a 3 yr old but since my pregnancy he’s as gone downhill rapidly . He’s due home soon from hospital after an overdose but the help I suppose to be getting just doesn’t seem enough. I’m scared to death this is just the beginning! Has anyone been in the same situation?