Forum

Please help, I feel lost!

Hi im 39yrs old and saw a consultant yesterday after being referred to him due to another abnormal brain scan. He said he thinks its probable that I have MS due to the results of the scan and my previous medical history. My symptoms at the moment are dizziness and extreme tiredness and muscle pains. Previously when i was 20 yrs old I had what they think was a stroke… it lasted for 6 weeks and i was in a wheelchair for at least 4 weeks, i lost the use of my right arm completely but could still walk a little at that time. I completely recovered from it, the MRI at that time showed inflamation on the brain, I had another MRI about 7 yrs later due to pins and needles in my Left hand which showed white matter lesions. I fell pregnant 3 weeks after recovering from the stroke, I lost the baby, he was stillborn and I luckily fell pregnant with twins soon after - there 17yrs old now and I have had another son of 14. I’ve suffered what I thought was two nervous breakdowns during the last 19 yrs, the first 7 months after the birth of my last son and another 4 years after that and have had little episodic problems, but nothing serious until recently. Can anyone give me any advice on whether this is MS? Or could it be something else, Im very scared and not sure where to turn for help?

The consultant said he wants me to have another MRI scan, blood tests and a lumber puncture - I had one of those done when I was 20 and I remember how horrible it was then…

Hi Chelle

I am too recently DX to give you any real advice on weither you have MS or not. But I would like to offer my moral support I know how scared you are I am too, the uncertanty is a killer and from what I’ve seen on here many of us have this for a long time. But the support and advice you can find here is great and helps you to feel less alone. For what its worth I had a lumber puncture about 2 months ago and it was no where near as bad as I expected it to be infact the antisipation was far worse!!

DL

Thanks DL, Im sure im more worried about having the lumber puncture than anything else… Its good to hear yours wasnt too bad and I know I have just got to go through with it. I suppose I just dont want there to be anything wrong with me! and Im sure you and others on here wish that too. Ive been reading some of the posts and I am starting to see that people have suffered without a diagnosis for years, my only hope is that if it is MS I will get some medical help instead of feeling like im going insane with strange feelings and a body that just doesnt want to do the things I want it to do! and the tiredness, its relentless at times, like a really bad bout of flu, but having to go to work and struggle through the day, its difficult to hide it from work colleagues and im scared my recent promotion will be affected if I get any worse?

Chelle x

I have to say I’m lucky on the work front as I have been a stay at home Mum for the last 2 years and although I have to battle the mornings and school run once its over I can go back to bed if I am having a bad day. But I remember the struggle that work brought only too well because although I have only had my DX for 3 weeks and my DX process took only took 6 months I have had the symptoms and been in denial of what they were for at least 5 years!!!

Remember to take it easy after the lumber or the headaches will be bad, take a few days off work and do nothing if you possibly can.

DL xXx

Thanks for the advice, I will make sure I take time off work to recover from the Lumbar / P.

Work has been full on lately, does stress and overworking trigger symptoms? Ive had loads of stress lately, my husband left me under difficult circumstances last October and I was working at least 50 hrs + a week, including some weekend work too at times until recently.

Chelle x

Yes Chelle stress can definitely exacerbate MS symptoms but even if you do not have MS, stress is bad for virtually every illness. Try to give yourself a break and cut down your hours at work. I hope you manage to get some answers soon. Teresa xx

Stress makes things so much worse. Try hard to find ways to relieve or control it where possible. Gentle yoga and meditation help me but everyone is different and you will need to find what works for you. Teresa is right maybe consider cutting down your working hours and give yourself a break no one is super human.

DL xXx

Thanks for your posts on this, I know I need to just rest and stop stressing. Im off this week on leave and have done absolutely nothing all week as been too tired to do anything and after seeing the consultant on Monday im feeling pretty low anyway. God knows how im gonna face work next week, i think i should talk to my employer and tell them whats going on with me? Maybe they will be supportive around my working hours, even if i could work from home a day a week would be less of a strain than facing 5 full on days.

Chelle x

Goodness me! Three teens, working 50+ hours a week and a divorce. That’s an awful lot of stress!

I think stress was what brought my symptoms on. I am curently going through divorce. The ex has Bipolar disorder and the past 14 years have been a sheer living hell at times. Sadly, too much damage over 14 years led to the breakdown of our marriage. I could no longer cope with his actions and concequences of them. It was a very stressful break and he did not cope well with it. I tend to cope well with stress but it almost always comes out as a physical illness with me.

Best wishes to you and I cope you can try to destress your life a little.

Jo :slight_smile:

Hello Chelle x I wholeheartedly agree with the others regarding stress! It’s a difficult decision whether or not to tell work. I blurted it all out to my boss as I was in such a state and they (including personnel) have been extremely suppotive. I’m not dignosed but they have said that I should take any time off I need and when I’m ready can go back on a ‘phased return’ if needed. I’ve been off for 9 weeks now.

Jo - I’ve also noticed that stress hits me physically x any upset - even something exciting! - leaves me with flu like symptoms xxxjenxxx

Hello from me too

I ditto all of the above and if you read back through old posts there is really good advice and reassurance that LP have come on a long way since your last one and at least they will point the way to diagnosis.Read back and im sure they will help put your mind at rest.

Limbo is a difficult place to be but we are as good a support network as any and at least we know what you mean,as whatever it is that troubles you someone will of had it.However the only certainty with ms is uncertainty…we all experience it differently as a whole, although share different individual symptoms/fears etc

Hang in there

Pip

Thanks to you all, I so glad I found this forum and all your support, its helping just to know Im not alone, ive ran from this and feared it for years… convincing myself that it will go away and that any strange symptom meant I was having another migraine, without the headache! I get them on average monthly and loose my vision before the headache starts and the weakness in my limbs… I just need to face the truth now, I hope limbo land is not too long. I had the appointment for my MRI scans today, its on the 8th May, there doing a MRI Head, Spine Cervical and Spine Thoracic… is this normal for diagnosis? and what are they scanning the other areas for? I dont really understand it all…

Thanks Guys,

Chelle x