Good day folks, I recently woke up in hospital, the ICU to be precise, I heard a voice saying, you’ve awoke, I’ll get the doctor. I was still coming too when a doctor arrived with a nurse. Good day Brian, nice to see back in the living. What hap, how did I get here. The doctor told me a tale of how I had been in a terrible car crash, that I had been brought in barely alive, but thanks to a great surgeon I had made it, and for the last five days, lying in a coma. One unfortunate turn up was my penis had been severed and never found. I lay there in silence, trying to take it in. Then the doctor said that I had been awarded a compensation package of £12,000, and that due to pioneering work, they could replace my penis, it would be roughly £1000 an inch, and that I should talk it over with my wife before making any decision, after all, he continue you wouldn’t want a five incher, if you had more, and she would be very disappointed if you had nine inches, and only bought five inches. Tell me when the two of you have spoken it fully.
It was a couple of days later that I manage to see to the doctor again. He asked, have you spoken to your wife Brian. I replied I had, that we discussed it fully and made a decision. And what would that decision be then, how many inches. None, I replied, we’re getting granite workgroups.