just a rant

Hi

Sitting in my lounge at 3.00am cant sleep again so thought i would write a few things down see who else goes through the same thing i have been full time carer for my wife for 9 years she has been diagnosed with ms for 15 years and throughout all that time has coped with everything that this disgusting disease has been able to throw at her with courage dignity and without complaint she is my true hero

The last couple of years have been tough ones i had been nursing my father since 2009 after he had a stroke which initially had not seemed to have had too much lasting damage but slowly he deteriorated until in 2013 he was unable to cope living on his own so we moved in with him at his house luckily big enough for us all to live together sadly he passed away in 2014 from pneumonia which was a traumatic 8 weeks from the time he was admitted to hospital who were wholly incapable of caring for someone who needed the kind of care he needed

January 2014 our daughters birthday she was 27 was not a good day my wife accidentally took an overdose of oramorph and died on our bedroom floor the paramedics arrived with seconds to spare and saved her and after a worrying few days in hospital she was thankfully ok but it transpired she had permanent chronic damage to her back the reason for the pain which had caused her to accidentally to overdose then in June she had a relapse which took away all her mobility usual story which meant she needed support 24 hours for toilet /walking etc NHS were the usual incompetent bunch of idiots GP not interested luckily she had her annual appt with the Neuroligist 5 weeks later ( no chance of getting an earlier appt ) thought she had just lost confidence in walking suggested some physio to date no sign of any physio OT were also contacted had a letter to say she is on the waiting list which is 4 months long again to date no sign of them thankfully she has improved so that at least she can make to the toilet on her own so that i can leave her for a little while without the worry of her falling if she suddenly needed the toilet. Inlaws are now playing up saying we dont visit them enough just to ratch the pressure up a bit more. Sorry i know its just a big moan lots of people go through much worse but felt good to write it down

On the plus side going out with our son today to get him his birthday present one of the joys of life to see your children happy also our daughter coming to visit other daughter off work so will have whole family together a fairly rare treat so not all bad.

Things always seem worse in the small hours

Yes you’ve had a rant but your positivity showed In the end, we all like to let off steam sometimes. Enjoy your day with family it’s those kind of days that make everything else bearable.

Jan x

I know exactly what you are saying enjoy your time with family g

Eeee luv! I do think things can sometimes be magnified 100% in those wee hours, when we cant sleep. It can feel like youre the only one in the world!

If I am sleepless or keep waking I find it is worse if I look at the clock. Ignoring those 4 red lights can help a lot.

My hubby is my main carer…has been for a lot of years. 4 yeas ago, I began getting direct payments, which enable me to pay 3 other carers. I have a lovely lady come in every day to get me up, showered etc. I have 2 ladies who take me out once a week. They also take me on short holidays and do 2 sleepovers a week.

This marvelous help gives my hard pressed hubby a bit of time to himself.

Thankyou for being such a loving husband to your lady. Bless you and all our other carers…we appreciate you immensely!

pollyxx