is this because of MS or not?F

Hi everybody, I am not sure wether this is because of MS, or in my head (which my husband says it is!). We are having some problems at the minute which my husband swears it is NOT because of my MS. I have just found out that he gets up early every morning to watch porn. I also found out yesterday that he has made friends on Facebook with his ex (of 25 years). He hasn’t been able to perform in bed for about a year. He swears it is not my fault as I can’t move easily any more (although I do try as best I can). I am lost, I don’t know what to think anymore. I don’t have any close friends anymore to talk to about this (all my friend have done disappearing acts when my MS really kicked in), so I am asking here for your opinions. I can’t stop crying today

Lynne x

Hi Lynne,

I am sorry you are having it hard just now.

But where do you want start,a good start would be to sit down with your husband and have good chat,get it all out in the open.

If that does not help relate is good too if he will go.

If none of these help you and your husband,you must think of yourself,and what you want.

I hope you are able to sort this.

Take Care,


Hi Lynne

I think you really deserve ((((hugs))))

It could be your OH has erectile disfunction and he might benifit from a trip to the GP. My fella has had a problem in that ‘department’ and TBH he could only get off watching porn, I think it short circuits the male brain - I just don’t get what men see in it - now he gets viagra on script and every so often we have a nice evening

You do need to talk this out, maybe explain to him how the news that he has facebook contact with his x at this time is making you very uncomfortable.

There are many different positions you can try if you and he are both up for it at the same time.


unfortunately you have found the hard way but ms is kill or cure to any relationship be it friends or family I cannot even start to count the so called ‘friend’ I have lost,

no its not in your head, you just want your husband to love you the way you are now and not make comparesons to how you used to be

you say you have no one to talk to, can you not get to see relate? if its something you both need to get sorted they are impartial so would not look to blame anybody.

as soon as I got my dx we had a really bad time of it what we both did is we both wrote down what we would miss if we did split up (which we didnt)

writing things down helped a lot as we both got out point across without the other butting in and we did it in a low voice not shouting just listening what the other had to say

Oh Lynne,

I could just cry for you wheather he is or is not! it is putting a lot of preassure on you and i have just gone through a break up! not saying that you are!!! but i no how those feeling feel, we had the same problems in the bedroom and i don’t think that helped but if you love each other you can get over it talk to each other before it gets to far to come back from. I really hope it works out for you please don’t blame yourself for having ms this happens even if you don’t!!!

Thinking of you Tracy x

Hi Lynne

I dont know what to say to help but am sending you ((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))

Take care of yourself