Ignorance!!

My God, that is disgusting. Where do they live, I am very good at disembowling people. I am 6’ 3" and 14 stone. Let’s see if they’ld spit at me. It would be the very last thing that they did. That is truly vile.

Big hug Mrs H. x

I have sort of stopped saying if my MS bothers me as you get ‘oh I get that’ and ‘I get that too’,’ just your age’!!This can be anything from memory lapse to dragging my left leg, numb in parts,spasms…

I wouldn’t mind but I am very wary of blaming MS for everything

That pees me off tbh.But at end of day do laugh and think its amazing amount of folk that have MS!!!Practically everyone!

Thank you, Adrian. It was truly awful. She was stood in a doorway, blocking the entrance so I said excuse me please to her turned face and she twisted her face up and then spat at me in my wheelchair. No witnesses unfortunately !!

Good Lord MrsH that is truly awful !!!

I can only imagine how upsetting that must have been.

That level of ignorance and hatred is impossible to understand.

Pat x

Thanks, Pat…as long as I live, I will never understand inhumanity and intolerance towards each other…it would have been bad enough, if it had been a stranger but from someone we know…mad, bad world. Xx

I suppose it’s fear isn’t it. Fear of the “other”… racial prejudice, homophobia, hatred of disabled… it’s not an excuse but I suppose that’s what causes it.

Reading it reminds me of reading accounts of 1930’s Germany.

And from someone you know! Terrifying.

Pat x

Hi All, I too had a meet up with a dear friend of many years and had decided to tell him about my ms. We met up in our old favourite Sussex pub where many many hours of motorsport, our endeavours as a racing team, and every driver and wheel turn had been discussed over 15 years of almost weekly get togethers . You may have to be a petrol head to get this, but this doctor friend of mine with a dry sense of humour replied to " I have got ms " with " ok, where are you holding him? " There is a well known F1 driver with these initials btw . We laughed a lot, then had the serious discussion :slight_smile: Regards Paul

That’s a good story Paul. It’s nice to hear something positive. My friends and family have been really good too. They don’t really get it but I know that they are there if I need them. My lodger has been excellent aswell. So supportive and will sit down and listen to me winge when I am going through it.

Have a good day.

Adrian.

I had an incident in work a few months back. I was relapsing and had heaviness in my arm. The security doors in work are pretty heavy so instead of pushing them with my weak arm, I was opening it by shouldering it (I had to push a button with my left at the same time). There was a girl behind the door and I hit her with it, and with some force because I shouldered it open.
I was apologising profusely and the girl was fine, but a “lady” who was behind me made a comment about me needing to be more careful and there was no need to open the door like I was playing a game of rugby.

This “lady” nearly died though when I pointed out it was necessary because of my MS and weakened arm. I’d say she wanted the ground to swallow her.

Like other posters here, I knew little to nothing about MS before I was diagnosed.

I’m in Ireland and there is a high profle “right to die” case in the media which is being brought by an MS sufferer who is profoundly disabled. I’ve had a few friends say to me that their partners or parents (who wouldn’t know me but would have heard my tale of woe) have said “Oh I really hope Meme isn’t watching that!”

The folks I work know me and my attitude to my MS and it wouldn’t even occur to them that something like that story would upset me. But people who don’t know me think that I will end up the same way. MS in Ireland is a bit of a hot topic at the moment but it’s all extreme examples which isn’t really teaching people about MS other that the worst case scenario.

[quote=“Gladys”]

I have sort of stopped saying if my MS bothers me as you get ‘oh I get that’ and ‘I get that too’,’ just your age’!!This can be anything from memory lapse to dragging my left leg, numb in parts,spasms…

I wouldn’t mind but I am very wary of blaming MS for everything

That pees me off tbh.But at end of day do laugh and think its amazing amount of folk that have MS!!!Practically everyone!

[/quote] I get that too, and then 'it must be something in the water!, …if only!,

There may not be a legal requirement for shops to provide mother and baby bays, but store car parks are controlled by the store operators so if they provide mother and baby spaces and it clearly states that the spaces are reserved for mothers with young babies and toddlers, that is the store’s discretionary right.

Likewise, if the disabled spaces provided by the store have a sign saying that the spaces are for disabled badge holders only and that anyone parking in those places must display a valid blue badge, then that is the store’s right too.

"“Disabled people people are not even required to display a blue badge despite most peoples beliefs”

The following is from the Citizens Advice Bureau:

““The blue badge scheme does not apply on private roads, private car parks, in off street car parks and in some airports. There may be some parking spaces for disabled people in these areas and they will either be subject to the conditions imposed by the parking operator or be designated by law, with signs and markings that make this clear. If the parking space is designated by law and it is used by a non-blue badge holder, this is a parking offence. It will be enforced in the same way as on-street parking, by the police or by the local authority.””

I recently had the need to ask a traffic warden what the law was in our city with regard to disabled bays and mother and baby bays. I was told that if the disabled bays were all taken that i could use the mother and baby bays as a person with a blue badge takes precedence of a mother and baby. I don’t know if the same rule applies everywhere.

Mary

When I told my family, all I got was ‘oh Kirstin’s neighbour has that and are absolutely fine…you wouldn’t think there is anything wrong with them’ and when I talk about starting dmds. I got ‘oh its just like my neighbour who has diabetes’. Really winds me up cos they haven’t got a clue!! I sent my mum an MS booklet to try and explain but she misinterpretted that asmeaning there would be nothing wrong with me for ‘most’ of the time (I have RRMS) despite me telling her I some sort of symptom all the time!! Oh and since I was diagnosed the support from my family has been zilch…no phone calls, messages …or anything (they live 100 miles awa) I have more support from you guys on here and my martiall arts school!!!. Sorry…rant over

I try not to tell anyone that I’ve got it as the few people who do know will never ever have a clue what it’s really like so I don’t waste my breath telling them that I don’t feel too good on any particular day. The only people who really understand fully are people with ms and very similar illnesses, that’s how it will always be, that’s the reality of it. That’s why this forum is so special to me and all you other good people on here.

As a mother with MS, I would think that if the disabled bays are full, a disabled person has the right to use a M&B spot. Absolutely!

What’s the other option? A regular space far away from the entrance? It’s not like a blue badge is easy to get. I don’t have one because I can easily walk and I wouldn’t even consider using a disabled spot. A M&B spot is nothing more than a benefit imo, whereas a disabled spot is a necessity.

A M&B spot makes life a bit easier but if one wasn’t free, you’d still manage to get out of the car and into the shop. If a disabled person can’t get a wide spot or one near the door, they may have to completely cancel the idea of going to the shop completely.

I’ve always thought the the M&B spots should not be near the doors anyway. That way people won’t take them if they don’t have kids as the main advantage to them for a healthy parent is the wider spaces and the path running from the space to the shop, not the proximity to the shop which is an essential part of a disabled space.

I think the points that Meme has made are very sensible, just thought I’d chip in with that !!!

I too agree with meme…I am also a mother, I get annoyed however with people parking in other and baby spaces that don’t have children, nor do they have a disabled badge or they may have children but these children are clearly older than twelve! A disabled spot is a necessity and it is unfair to expect a disabled person to not park I a supermarket because they cannot use free spaces in the mother and baby spots… There choice is eave or risk walking from a space not close. Given I work with a lot of disabled people assessing I would hate to see them faced with this decision and would say for many people I see parking far from the supermarket is a risk in itself and how many with stick, rollaters, wheelchairs etc would get out is beside me given a door has to be fully open for the to get out safely. And I too agree many people are ignorant… I come across it sometimes when I tell people what I have. They don’t seem to understand. Some will say so you’ll be in a wheelchair?. Anyway we know we are bigger than them ignorant people xxxx

I’ve been following this thread with interest, particularly the disabled space vs mother and baby space discussion. I’m not a blue badge holder - luckily I don’t need one yet - but I have been a mother, albeit 20 years since I last had a toddler to deal with. Do young mums not realise that M&B spaces are a very recent development and those of us with children years ago managed perfectly well to get out of our cars, put a child into a buggy and walk across a car park/!! I was aghast at the one poster who thought that mothers with children should have equal rights with blue badge holders - NO, THEY ABSOLUTELY SHOULD NOT - and no right thinking citizen would think they should!!

“” I was aghast at the one poster who thought that mothers with children should have equal rights with blue badge holders - NO, THEY ABSOLUTELY SHOULD NOT - and no right thinking citizen would think they should!!“”

I’m assuming that comment above was referring to me. But if you read my post properly, I did not say that mothers and children should have equal rights with blue badge holders. I said that NOBODY should receive special treatment. Everyone should be treated equally. As far as the supermarkets are concerned, they supply spaces designated for disabled badge holders and they also supply spaces for mothers with babies. Whether that is right or wrong is neither here nor there but that is what they do.

I am not anti blue badge holders, I have one myself, and regularly use a wheelchair or walking frame, and I also have grown up children, and like you, when my children were small there were no mother and baby spaces, but that doesn’t change the fact that they are supplied now.

I don’t believe that disabled people (myself included) are any more special than anybody else, be that mothers with babies, toddlers, teenagers, pensioners or anybody else. EVERYONE should be treated equally.

Dawn

By that logic, if there was only ONE available seat left on the London underground and five people wanted to get on and they were: a disabled person, a pensioner, a mother with a young child, a teenager, and a healthy adult, then none of them would have any more right to the seat than any of the others!! I think most of us would agree that we would let the disabled person have the seat.

Tracey