Hi just thought I would share this…was out for a meal with some friends on sat night and after our meal we moved into the bar for a drink…I had a couple of people giving me ‘that sort of pity look’ actually that doesn’t bother me so much as they don’t really understand ms what did annoy was a guy I know ( he was also drunk) kept asking are you ok and he kept repeating it! Bit tedious by now I said yes I’m fine are you?..he replied with I heard you got that muscle wasting disease!!..honestly I just wanted to educated him right there on ms but think if would have been wasted as to be honest I had been working most of the day and was totally knocked didn’t have a discussion in me to be honest!..does anybody get people being ignorant I suppose you all do!..I also kinda of stumbled outside and grabbed my friend a woman was looking and my friend said she thinks your drunk unfortunately I was on coke!!..I said rather loudly well I’ve got ms!!! They don’t know where to look with that one ha!!! Emma x
I have had a few shockingly ignorant comments in my time. But the one that irritates me the most is when people get MS mixed up with ME. But that probably says something bad about my view on ME.
Hi I’ve been stepped over and pushed out of the way, spat at when I said excuse me please and despite me holding the Boots advantage card in my hand, the cashier asked my hubby if he had a card. But I have also been subject to some lovely, caring gestures by complete strangers so, a bit of both. Xx
Have to admit that my knowledge about MS and it’s symptoms etc… were limited until it affected me directly, so I try to remember that if I think any comments from people are ignorant…
I agree with tay. I knew nothing about MS until I got it. And now of course I know loads about MS but I know nothing about Muscular Distrophy, Parkinsons… etc etc.
I do know how frustrating it is when people come out with ignorant remarks… but I try to remember that I used to be one of ‘them’.
I also remember saying to people with MS or anything else… ‘You look SO well’… and now I know how irritating that is!
A friend popped in a few weeks ago as he was passing. I hadn’t seen him in at least a year, but we chat from time to time. During chatting over a cuppa he noticed my MS booklets etc lying around, and said ‘Oh, you’ve got MS? That’s the one that just goes away most of the time’. I didn’t try and correct him, just listened to what he had to say, nodded politely and saw him off when he’d finished his tea sigh
I also agree with Tay and Pat, six months ago I knew nothing about MS, or any other neurological diseases, but I’d like to think I would have put a little thought into what I said, and I am the queen of ‘foot in mouth’ syndrome!
It reminds of a time, long ago now, in the days when I was told i probably had PPMS.
I went to a family party and the discussion was about MS.
A cousin said,
Well its nothing to worry about. Someone at work has it and when he feels bad, he popps a pill and he
Wouldn’t it be good if that was all we had to do!!! I think the most annoying thing so far is people saying “M.S, oh yes my mother’s, brother’s auntie has that”…and constantly asking how I am!! No one ever used to be that concerned! lol
When I was doing office work for a welll known retailer at Gatwick Airport I used to ride my scooter round between the shops (there was no way I could walk the distances required) but get off the scooter and do what I had to do in each shop on my feet leaving the scooter close by. Returning to the scooter one day the gentleman who had the nerve to be sitting on it waiting for his wife looked me up and down said ‘You don’t look very disabled to me’.
I was very tempted to say ‘And you don’t look ignorant to me but you obviously are’. But being at work I bit my tongue and just said ‘You’d be suprised’. Ignorance indeed.
As Tay & Pat have said, I didn’t a clue about MS when I was diagnosed other than thinking wheelchairs were probably involved. And I’m completely ignorant about other illnesses like Motor Neurone Disease or Parkinsons, so it doesnt surprise me when people don’t know what it means. That said, it can be a bit frustrating that people make assumptions rather than asking. But generally I’m happy to educate people & put them right.
[quote=Spud]Only last week one of my ex work colleagues accused me of double standards on facebook and got a ‘like’ from a stranger because I was discussing the fact that we had to park in a mother and baby bay because there were no vacant disabled bays. I moaned about the disabled bays being taken by non displayers and used a m&b bay to be told. ‘So two wrongs suddenly make a right do they’? Then ‘Ha ha ha don’t you just love these people with double standards’? I went into a two day rant about the danger of making wheelchair users cross car parks AND how the flaming hell do you get a wheelchair between the cars in standard size bays?
To be fair, the same could be said for the difficulty in getting a baby into a buggy and getting it through small spaces in the car park… I do agree about the importance of disabled bays but ‘M & B’ bays are there for a reason too…
The thing that bugs me is the friends and family who know I have MS, and what type I have (PPMS), but have clearly never bothered to look it up so they keep telling me, helpfully, about new medication and/or research on RRMS
Sorry, but I have to agree with your ex work colleague, and with Tay above. Disabled spaces are for disabled. Mother and Baby spaces are for mother and baby.
""Mothers with baby’s can get in their place and stop thinking they can barge in front of anybody else for special treatment."
OMG, I wasn’t aware they did think they could ‘barge in front of anybody else for special treatment’!!!
NOBODY should get special treatment. Everyone should be treated equally. You sound very bitter and twisted, calling your ex colleague a ‘Stupid Cow’ and I noticed in one of your other threads you referred to a stranger as a ‘lumpy tart’.
Last year i went out with my brother for a pub lunch. The landlord noticed me walking very badly with my stick and when my brother went to the bar to order asked him if i was “alright in the head” !!!
I’ve lost count of the number of times family and friends have cut out and given me newspaper storys about a treatment for RRMS ( i’ve got PPMS). If only there was a treatment.
this sickens me to the core,that this happens,i am quite badly disabled with my ms, but i tell you what,if i was spat at or pushed out of the way,the adrenaline rush i would get,caused by my outrage, would let me b*y well punch their lights out,how the h dare anyone treat you so badly.
Me too…normally…I was just so shocked …the person that spat at me is someone I know !!
When I told a good mate I had been diagnosed with MS he replied ‘that’s not so bad it just means you feel tired a lot’ I was quite shocked until I realised he was getting confused with M.E. we laugh about it now. And yes we’ll meaning members of family constantly giving me cut out snippets from newspapers about some miracle cure is fairly irritating but well meant.
My God, that is disgusting. Where do they live, I am very good at disembowling people. I am 6’ 3" and 14 stone. Let’s see if they’ld spit at me. It would be the very last thing that they did. That is truly vile.
Big hug Mrs H. x