Forum

I`m having a great time!

Afternoon guys. Right who`s ready for a bit of Friday fun? Hope you enjoy reading this!

As you know, I am the recent recipient of a ceiling hoist.

Just had a wonderful time with it. Here goes;

I was stting in my recliner, reading my PMs when I felt a sudden urge to wee.

Hubby was in the kitchen washing/drying our poodle Lucy. So he couldn`t hear my calls.

I thought, Right, its up to me. Not wanting to wee in situ I knew Id better get sorted. So I pulled the hoist over me (it hangs at my side), fastened the straps of my sling to the hoist (I now sit and sleep on the sling, for easy access, it isn`t uncomfortable) and up i floated.

Now for the tricky bit. I do need someone to guide me over my wheelie or I keep on travelling along the track. I made a grab for the back of the wheelie, but missed. I began to spin. Went round 3 times and was heading for the opposite wall…Thought I`d be joining the neighbours for tea!

Then I wriggled and jiggled until I got back near the wheelie.then I made a grab for it`s back again…got it! Now I needed to lower myself into the seat…yeh, keep going,… nearly there. Chuff it! The footrests were up and one shoved my left leg to the wrong side and I was stuck again!

Bit more writhing around and managed to get hold of the foot rest (I call call em stirrups!). I yanked it off its post and chucked it out of the way…followed by t`other one.

Hope youre all still following this.............no, havent weed myself yet.

At last I was in situ and unstrapped myself from the hoist, gathered up straps and set off for the loo…crashed into the door frame, taking yet another chunk of wood with me (I`m making the house open plan, bit by bit!)

Hubby saw me passing through the kitchen…How the chuff did you get there? he asked. Lucy looked at me, as hubby held her up by her front legs as he blow dried her tum., as if to say, Mum, help me get away from this torture!`

I dashed to the loo and kept telling myself to hang on to my bladder contents. I was forced to take my life in my hands and heave myself up and onto the loo…whilst pulling at my pants…onto the loo.made it…then I waited for hubby to get me to make the return journey.

Got some more bruises now to add to my gallery! Banged my toes too.ouch!

Phew!

All good fun, innit?

Hope no-one`s wet themselves reading this.

luv Pollxxx.

Aw, Poll,

The way you describe it!

This would work well as a cartoon series, but only for people with a certain dark sense of humour, I think.

The missing loo roll has just turned up, so I can go to the bathroom again now, and not have to worry about wetting myself.

T.

Hi Poll

It sounds like both you and Tina have now sorted out your toilet requirements! Well done both of you.

Hope you didn’t hurt yourself though Poll, what a bummer just to have a wee!

Take care and have a good weekend.

Pam

Poll, you do make me laugh, I love hearing about these adventures. Well done on using it! Cheryl:)

Oh Poll it’s like an MS version of ‘I Love Lucy’…

Pretty remarkable though. Whenever I hear another of those blo*dy stories about an MSer who has climbed Everest I’ll make sure I tell them about you and your hoist. MUCH more impressive in my book.

Pat xx

I think you need to find yourself an author Poll and have your little escapades published.

Miss Poll and her antics…

Poll rides again

Up up and away…as Mr Poll and Lucy looked on in supprise

keep 'em comming Poll

xx Maria.

You are awesome Poll! Not only did you perform an amazing feat but you made me laugh loads! Teresa xx

Good for you girl , don’t let the ( insert oath of your choice ) beat yer.

David

Poll,

What a larf you are. A larf a minute reading your posts.

Just need to get your G with his camcorder and you could make a fortune on Youtube and that other silly programme. Can’t remember tha name now!! I just hate getting old!!

Well done anyway on getting to the loo on your own. But how long did you have to sit there waiting for hubby to get you? Sounds like Lucy was getting more attention than you!

C x

Cheers to all who replied. Got another story for you coming up…oh what fun my life is…

luv Pollx