Brain Fog

Everyday living
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Not looked on here for a day and there’s another 16 replies to read! We must keep this thread going, but must Never forget it’s original reason for being. ie socks!!! Plain, patterned, odd, holey, well darned (who could bother to darn them?) , summery, wintry or whatever!

Reading about our dreadful memory capabilities, or how well they behave regarding rubbish useless facts, which is the opposite of what we’d prefer, made me add to my portfolio of new bodily inventions.

Several of you have signed up for my utterly brilliant idea for the Wrist Waste Away System dual valves. One valve on one wrist would tidily , with no trickle, empty our bladders. The other wrist will house the valve hat emptied the bowel. They will both be so tidily fitted that no-one would ever guess what they’re for.

Okay, yeh, I’m still looking for that Mr. Fantastic surgeon who’ll pioneer the job!

I’m now adding to this, a memory ‘empty’ facility. It will automatically clear the brain of crap…Don’t fret Missus, nothing of any true value will be erased…Just the nonsense and medical jargon!

Hold on, I be another idea. I’ve been nurturing this one for a good while.

I desperately need a snooze switch in my brain. I waste hours of sleeplessness nights, when I can’t switch off, thinking about stuff I’ve thought about during the day! Why the chuff I want to go over it again, is beyond me!

Now this HAS to be capable of turning itself back on. Knowing how much my withering irks my oh, I could never rely on him to do so!

Do you think Mr Fantastic surgeon would do all 3 jobs in one op?

Right, enough already!

Pollx

PS, whose got odd socks on today?

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Blast, missed some days, need socks, yak they are horrid, getting some tomorrow. Didn’t properly replace the thrown ones.

Pissquick was a nikname as a child, reminded me reading the earlier posts about ‘being so busy’. I guess I must have always been ‘busy’. One of those names the adults use when they think you aren’t listening! (Sorry he who manage the forum, hope this acceptable if not please feel free to delete).

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Did you get my ‘odd socks’ post on fb Poll. Two of my lovely cousins shared lots of new socks with me - and my dear old mum - and we all have odd stripes/spots/patterns - and the idea is when we put them on we think about one another.

Mum still wears hers - she is 93 - and l expect she has forgotten why we have these odd socks!

Somebody did ask me if l dressed in the dark!

Whilst you are designing improvements for bodily functions. And they can’t come too soon, l must say. Would love a switch that put me to sleep instantly - 6hrs would be good. For years, l have managed only 3 or 4 and not continuously.

And wouldn’t it be great if we could be ‘transported’ asleep - go to amazing holiday destinations without all the terrible hassle of airports/coaches etc. l watched The lsland Parish last night - would love to be on that beach - joining in the fun of the carnival - [on my Tramper] -

Your ‘Wrist Waste Away Dual Valves’ would come in handy. Easy to disguise with flower garlands and red feathers.

Back to dreaming.

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Hebe, I’ve missed you. Hopefully you’ll replace the old socks soon and be back to your normal form.

I don’t think you should tell us about being called ‘pissquick’. It might catch on. Mind you, I wouldn’t mind pissing a bit quicker! So if your post is deleted, so will mine be. Hahahahaha!

Happy new sock day

Sue x

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Here we are again, happy as a flea. Sitting on on the bathroom floor, waiting to be free …

I got up for a wee, legs gave way under me, and I ended up shouting bullocks ( or a similar word) as I crumpled to the floor!

And it’s a whole 8 days since I’ve been in this position. Waiting for paramedics to come and pick me up.

The SPC can’t come soon enough. Only a couple of weeks to go.

Aaarrrrrggghhhh!!!

Sue

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Have you called the hunky paras again Sue? Now this is becoming a bit obvious. I know, you’re throwing yourself on the floor just for attention! And you’ve had enough medical attention these last few weeks, to satisfy the very worst Munchausen person!!!

Seriously now, the sooner you get Tina Turner and your spc, the better.

March 3rd? How many sleeps is that?18?

So when you were on the bathroom floor, it must’ve been cold. Did you have some warm socks on? I do hope so!!!

Pollwollyetc xx

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The paramedics are really not hunky down here you know Poll (no James Martins of the ambulance world!). And I actually didn’t have any socks on. That was possibly a failing on the part of my lovely OH. He got me a blanket, a towel to sit on and one under my feet, a fleece and a pillow. But no socks!! Damn that uncaring brute.

Then again, if I’d been wearing socks when it happened, I probably would’ve blamed the socks.

Once I have the SPC, there’ll probably be no need for Tina Turner in the bathroom (for those of you unaware, this is a turning device for people who have trouble swivelling - it’s Pollys’ name for her old one!). Since I won’t be attempting to get out of bed at 3am and going to the loo on my own.

And yes, I do think that when I stop getting all this medical attention, I am at risk of developing Munchausens. But happily, there are sufficient appointments over the next couple of months to keep the most attention seeking nutcase happy.

Sue

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Tina Turner/Steamy Windows…what a clever thought. I love Ms T.T. and do have many of her CDs, but never connected the 2. And how she survived that brute of a man Ike, has always made me proud of womanhood.

I agree Sue, socks and slippery floors are not good bedfellows. But bedsocks in bed can keep the wintry chill off.

I just have to mention socks in every reply, as this is bound to interest and excite the lovely AD!!

pollsx

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OO Sue what a beggar, all sent to test us! Sock bag needed on the door handle just in case.

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Thank you Sue, needed a big rest and some big pills. Kept warm, ate well, up and about now and been to Primark. I buy clothes out of the boys section now as they go on easy and tend to have less daft buttons than ladies clothes.

Anyway, I am trying out their massage cushion sole shoe liners (er socks) to see if they do actually cushion the sole or if it is a load of tosh. I’m hoping they work for my very sore feet that are flapping about like flipper at the moment.

Stay well, Heartbeat then the Royal for me this afternoon, party on!

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Well yes of course socks are usually never far from my mind, or in fact my bed. I often start out wearing socks (sometimes only one depending on the internal or infernal heat of each foot) , then take them off as my feet and legs heat up and start Riverdancing (aka spasming). Last night as it happens, I felt my feet, both warm. Therefore no socks. I think I shall have to have words with Mr Sssue though. Most remiss about the socks. And in my befuddled (aka normal) state, it didn’t even occur to me.

And btw Poll, exciting Mr D is generally a bad thing. I think his keepers would have a thing or two to say about overexcitement / overstimulation. And of course, as we now all know, he might regress to his perennial complaint about where the odd socks go to / who steals them / the bad sock fairy, etc. (actually I made up the bit about the bad sock fairy, but actually I think that might even be the answer to the question as to where they vanish to!).

Sue

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Thank you Hebe for your commiserations. I’m glad the big pills have been helpful and a nice rest has brought you back to us. An afternoon of pointless TV sounds just the ticket. Not sure about things that massage your feet as you walk, sounds a bit like walking on ball bearings and a little painful. But then what do I know, my legs will barely allow me to walk 2 metres at the moment. In fact, earlier on I was really struggling to stand and remain upright holding onto the walker for more than a split second.

Sue

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Anyone spotted that Sue`s reply got this thread up to number 666???

Dont worry about getting AD over excited…it`s the only part of the day he looks forward to!

pollxx

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Heheheheheheheh

I am the Devils handmaiden.

xx

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ah sssue, polls and hebe

you make me chuckle every time i have a look at this thread.

very fond of Herr Durer actually.

ok i’m a nut job i admit it.

keep it going

carole x

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Dear Fiends,

I’m surprised and saddened to hear that people have trouble swivelling (see Ssssue’s contribution #662). Swivelling is a way of life here at Durer Towers.

Indeed, to stagger about and suddenly swivel on one leg while the other goes shooting off in another direction is de rigueur. We practise by running on ice with roller skates.

What’s that? Never tried running on ice with roller skates? You don’t know what you’re missing! Those guys at A& E really know what they’re doing.

Sleep tight folks,

Swivelling Albrecht

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I’m an ex swiveller…Does that count? I was a dab hand…Or should that be foot?..at the art of a fantastic swivel! TT would’ve been proud of me!

As a wheelie, I could get summat fitted to my wheels that resembles skates and join you lot on the ice!

Do ice roller skates require a certain type of sock?

Just asking. Wonder if I could knit some wheelie socks?

Pollsx

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Poll, get yourself a Zamboni. You can ride around resurfacing the ice while AD does weird and wonderful things on roller skates.

As for socks, anything will do except the lounge socks I bought recently - they have non-slip spots on the soles. I’d go for thermal socks on an ice rink, or thick walking socks. The ability to walk is not essential to the wearing of walking socks.

As for knitting socks for a wheelie - interesting thought. How big are the wheels? I was given a set of interchangeable circular knitting needles for Christmas. I’m wondering which cord I’d need if I ever wanted to do such a thing. Ooh! You’ve given me an idea. Hubby isn’t happy with the steering wheel cover in our motorhome. Maybe I could knit a new one!

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l bought my daughter a new sledge for xmas - about 3yrs ago. lt has not snowed here since!!! So it is still in its box.

l am hoping l can get on it - when we do get snow, as it has a seat and handlebars/brake for steering - and 3 short ski’s. Like a trike but with 3 ski’s instead of wheels.

Seemed a good idea at the time.

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I would like some wheelchair socks. They could be put on when entering other people’s houses to avoid leaving black trails in my wake. So if anyone figures out how to make / knit some, I’d like some small ones for the front castors and larger ones for the rear wheel of my self-propelling (huh, as if I’m capable of that out of doors!) wheelchair.

Maybe you could go on Dragons Den. I’m certain there must be a market for wheelchair socks.

Sue