One thing that’s been on my mind is how to balance independence with asking for help. There are a few jobs that are getting harder, but it’s not easy to speak up without worrying about bothering people.
How do you handle this? Do you have any “rules” for yourself about when to ask, and when to push through? I’d be interested to hear how others think about it.
I’m fiercely independent and determined to do things unaided when possible.
The exception being if something is time-limited. If, for example, I’ve got an appointment to go to and am running late, I’ll take whatever help to get me there on time or as close to the original time as possible.
Besides the punctuality aspect, accepting help keeps the stress level down.
In all other respects, I follow the use it or lose it principle: it may take me longer but if I don’t do it myself this time, then next time I might not be able to!
Hope this helps 
Morning @ MSJourney Jack,
I too am fiercely independent, never like asking, always want to do it myself, but sadly as the MS has got hold, there’s things I do need help with, do I like asking…NO, does this cause arguments with my hubby…YES I was the one who always did things, now that’s changed.
But what I would say is, if you really do need the help, then ask, that is what I’m now trying to do more, don’t feel like you’ve failed, some people on here can do more than others, well that’s good for them, but don’t you feel guilty if you need to ask.
Good luck to you and take care,
Jean
Hi @MSJourneyJack like @GCCK I am fiercely independent and strongly follow the “use it or lose it” rule.
That having been said, things that are very fiddly or just to damn exhausting (changing bed sheets being one) I have learnt to ask for help with and definitely no longer feel guilty!
If I have a rule, it’s being honest with myself about (1) things I can’t do or can’t safely do and (2) things that I can do but would really rather that someone else did for me. 
Thank you! It really helps!
You see? We’re not alone and it’s good to share.
Keeping our sense of self is important, but it helps to be flexible 
Anything involving travel of any form is starting to become impossible for me. So I’m learning to just say no more often; how long I’ll be able to do this work-wise without getting made redundant is what’s causing me profound stress. (I’m PPMS, dx 14 years ago…6.5 on EDS.)
Just be honest with those close to you. Don’t bottle things up..
Hi I am Autistic and possibly ADHD awaiting my assessment. I have SPMS. Plus I have arthritis in my hips and lower back. These combinations make asking for help even worse.
I will try and do things myself and then Iend up complaining or muttering under my breath which doesn’t help the situation!!
My children are also Autistic so its a case of shoulda, woulda coulda ask for help or not?
I guess I am rejection sensitve and think if I disturb them it will put them on a bad mood. Ive been told “mum, just ask” but I only remember after I’ve done whatever needed doing. I have a routine, but I’m also spontaneous to a fault!!
I need to slow down but my mind races to get things done…..what am I supposed to do?
Im confused.