Any advice is welcome - please xx


.I am 45 years old and I have had my MS diagnosed for 9 years,

My older sister has also got MS and has always felt guilty that her baby sister is more severe than her ( silly sausage)

Anyway, I have been working in a call centre for the last 4 years part time but the people that own the company have no knowledge or interest in MS and to be honest, it has been nice to be seen as one of the girls.

Unfortunately my Mum passed away at christmas and as work was short staffed was told to come in.

I obviously wasnt concentrating and made a mistake which resulted in a disciplinery.

I took some compassionate leave as I felt that my head was going to explode.

What with that and other tragic news, I struggled with life until May, where my gp signed me off with stress and anxiety

Since being off, I am having mobiltity issue’s with my hands and what appears to be a bulging disc (c4) cannot be operated on as it is a MS issue.

I walk with a stick and a fes and even though I am undergoing physio with a cartledge issue (tear and cyst) , I am still walking and I know that I am very lucky.

I would really appreciate advice on how do I cope financially and emotionally please.

As I have been working, I am still getting tax credits until my ssp stops.

I was told by cab that my employee can get ‘rid’ of me after 12 weeks on medical grounds???

Does anyone know if this is true?

We have also been told by DWP that we cannot get carer’s allowance as my partner works and earns more than £20k .

I feel awful as I read some other posts before posting this but I want to be honest and say that I do have savings and therefore believe that I have to have less than £16k before many benefits will be paid.

I only have these savings due to Industrial injury where I tripped and the injury resulted in major spine surgery,

What happens?

In the 2 months that I have been off, I am shocked by the impact of the depression and isolation and am so scared for the future…

We are trying to get an interest only mortgage as present but finding it challenging.

I am pretty sure that I am having a flare up as my eye sight, mobility issue’s have become worse.

If anyone can give me any advice on benefits, mortgages etc, I will be soooo grateful.

I just want to get better and I know that when I feel stronger that I will definately be going out of my way in making sure that people that are at home all day for whatever reason - ill health, finance issue’s etc will be visited and have some company and cuddles and giggles.

Thank you and I apologise in advance if my post is too heavy.


i am so sorry to hear about your mum. that alone is enough to deal with.

i’m sorry that i don’t have any legal knowledge regarding the benefits system but i think it’s dreadful if you are penalised for the compensation for your injury.

major spine surgery could have implications for the future.

i admire you for your plans to visit the housebound. your karma will be good - here’s hoping that you get your karma reward soon.

sending love and hugs ((((xxxx))))


Hi, wish I knew your name, to call you by it, but never mind , we can still try to help you. Please dont feel the need to apologise for your post. we all have bad times, when we need the advice and support of all on these boards. Thats why we`re here.

You sound like a very caring and loving friend anyone would be proud to have.

Your family life is enough to cause distress and worry, without having the added upset with work. I would think the CAB know the rules re employment/sick pay/ill health retirement.

I worked for the LA and was retired on ill health in 2000. Their rule was that an employee could take 6 months sick (with doctor`s certificates) on full pay and then a further 6 months on half pay.

These rules probably differ from those in the private sector.

Benefits sometimes are means tested, but DLA isn`t. Are you already in receipt of that?

I can`t help with mortgage info, sorry.

Emotionally I hope, you do find some comfort in knowing that this forum really does care about it`s members.

Does your Gp know how badly all this is affecting you? Maybe have a chat with him/her about that, eh?

Hoping things become a little easier for you very soon.

luv Pollyxx

Thanks Polly

I am so grateful for the support that I get from people who care or understand disability of any kind.

I appreciate what you have said about the CAB but to be totally honest, I have been very disappointed by them.

They have provided ‘advice’ that has caused unneccessary worry and has been inaccurate

I think it depends on the CAB that is local to you and unfortunately after 3 seperate visits - no thank you.

I do get DLA and have a motorbility car, so I do feel guilty as I know that I am lucky compared to some other’s but I don’t want loads, just to have bills paid.

Thank you for your reply


Re your post You will have a per contact as you have dovne 3 months You need too look at contract and see how long full sick pay. You need to look at phased return, occ health input. What the dap is not true you can get careers allowance with middle rateDLA. There is an HR bod amOngt ,members

Hi ya Mike

I am so sorry but could you re-type as I did not understand

Sorry to be thick but I did understand the bit about the contract but nothing else

Thank you

The first thing I want to say is that any advice you were given by CAB is likely to be correct. What they were referring to is “frustration of contract”. After you have been off sick for a time (the length of time depends on your contract of employment) if you are not able to return to work an employer can terminate your contract. Although this can seem harsh it makes some sense – an employer cannot hold your job open forever without some clear indication of when or if you will return.

If you are too ill to look for another job then the benefit that you need is Employment Support Allowance. You will be able to claim this for 12 months based on your NI contributions. After 12 months you will become ineligible because of your husbands earnings unless you are placed in the support group.
You can find out more about ESA at

I am assuming that you already get DLA because you were asking about carer’s allowance. If you don’t get DLA you can find out more at the website I already mentioned. (DLA is not dependant on earnings or savings)

You are quite right to assume that your husband’s income and your savings will preclude you from many benefits but not DLA or ESA for the first 12 months.

The isolation and depression you are feeling is very common when you suddenly stop working. It takes a time to develop a new and different life.

I can’t help with the mortgage issue because my experience with interest only mortgages + endowment insurance has not been very good. Due to falling interest rates my ex husband and I found ourselves with a potential shortfall on our marital home.

Hi Wendels,

Thank you for your advice and I agree with what you have said with regards to keeping my post open but the main reason that I am off with stress is down to them.

I have checked out some web sites that state that the employer is obliged by law to (Equality Act) provide all staff with desk assessments etc.

It also states that if more/different apparatus is required to continue with the job then the employer is legally obliged to obtain and they can get a grant to assist.

My contract does not state the amount of sick leave allowed, just states that after 4 weeks that a home visit will be arranged as this is part of the duty of care offered by the company. I have not even had a phone call.

I appreciate that I am just an employee but I also believe that Employer’s have a legal right to look after their staff

In the 4 years that I have been there, I have been late once, worked 3 christmas days, had a total of 1 week’s sickness (before this), moved with the company 3 times (including when I had to guard the building with other’s in case the landlords entered the office!!)

With regards to ESA, I am not married and I was under the impression that MS sufferer’s did not only have one years entitlement?

As for CAB, we will have to agree to disagree on that one but I do believe that they are different depending on the staff.

Within 3 different appointments , I was given opposite advice by 2 staff and was told that I was committing fraud!!!

After a sleepless night, I spoke to the relevant benefit office and thankfully the CAB were totally incorrect.

Like they say, different strokes for different folks.

But thank you once again for your repl


Hi ya Mike

I am so sorry but could you re-type as I did not understand

Sorry to be thick but I did understand the bit about the contract but nothing else

Thank you

[/quote] Sorry Having a bad day I send u MSG wen more awake Mike

I am sooo sorry to hear that,

There is no rush - sweet dreams


[quote=“Mikep”] Re your post You will have a per contact as you have dovne 3 months You need too look at contract and see how long full sick pay. You need to look at phased return, occ health input. What the dap is not true you can get careers allowance with middle rateDLA. There is an HR bod amOngt ,members [/quote] Hi You should have a contract as you need to be issued with a contract after 13 weeks by law. You can get careers allowance if you get middle rate DLA irrespective of earnings You will need too look at contract under sickness and see 1- how long sick pay is for 2- the rates of sick pay…eg. 3 months full, 3 months1/2 then ssp. Hope this helps also speak to you hr dept if thre is. Prob. Also see if medical retirement an option, reduction in hours if you get DLA/careers allowance. You cannot b sacked when on sick any probs on tact disabled law. Mike