Hi, I’m a limbo lander have been for over a year. Any of you that are in the same place & have been for sometime, do you still think & feel that I can’t believe this is happening to me & you can’t believe what is still to happen in the future! What keeps you going? How do you cope? Does it feel like the end of the world for you?
I forgot to add in, I’m coming up 32 this year & would love a child. Don’t know how I’m going to deal with this, get diagnosed, cope with it @ have a child! Not looking too promising I feel.
Its been 8 months for me (in limbo land), im 27 my wife is 32.
To answer your questions, I spoke to my wife just yesterday, we want children but she being a typicle woman wants to lose some weight first (not that she needs too!) however I am scared if we have children what would happen if they fell over I couldnt get to them to pick them up, If they are crying and my wife is so tied but I cant get out of bed to get to the cot. We dont even know if we can have kids as we havent tried but still the above and many more thoughts continuiously flow. Altimately My wife is amazing and give me great support, I have an appointment on Thursday as a follow up but im sure although I wont get a diagnoses thanks to guys on hear I have questions to ask to get the most out of it.
What keeps me going is knowing that I am still healthier than others, I have a nice home a loving wife and that I cant let her down. Also although quality of life can somedays/mostdays be reduced I still have a life worth living.
Yes It does feel sometimes like the end of the world, well my world but its not. Life is short as it is so regardless I still have all my limbs, I am not terminal.
I try to be greatful for what I have and not what im going through.
Hope this helps
I spent 15 months in limbo. Not very long compared to some. I can’t properly remember what I was thinking during that time; I think I may have been too knackered to think!
The one thing that I will always be grateful for is seeing a counsellor. She helped me big time. She made me face my fears and then really think about what they meant. She made me realise that I will be fine, come what may: that they may not even happen (they haven’t yet and I’m 15 years diagnosed this year) and that, if they do, there are so many people, meds, aids, organisations, therapies, etc available to help me, I won’t be on my own and I will cope. Facing those fears allowed me to let them go - an important step in coming to terms with everything.
As time’s gone on, I’ve come to realise that my greatest fears 15 years ago are 1) highly unlikely and 2) actually not that scary after all. If they happen, I really will be fine.
MS is cruel in many ways - it can be a slow erosion of abilities, hobbies and activities which is a bit like a death by many cuts. BUT, that means that we have NOW. Make the most of now. Make the most of what you can do now. The future is uncertain, but it may not be anywhere near as bleak as you might imagine - so make the most of the opportunity you’ve been given - don’t waste time worrying; get on with your life and try and carry as few "if only"s with you as you go.
Karen x
Hello anon,
I’m 27 was in limbo for 6 months then in april last year was told i have ms. My world did end the moment i was told, but slowly you grab normallity one peice at a time. I want to have kids soon and have a good career. If i sit and think about what might happen i would give up. I want more from life than i have had, so i won’t give up till i have it all.
I was waiting for an appointment with life insurance people when i was taken ill with my first ms attack. Needless to say they didn’t take me on after. But if i had signed up to the insurance i would be so much better off now. No point in thinking what could have been.
I will have kids one day and a career, just one step/day at a time.
Darren