Suggestions for bedtime early nights / lie ins

Hi…new poster on here. Currently struggling with balancing my caring role and work. I work full-time+ extra hours, sometimes I have to be in for 7am which means getting up at 5am. I have to assist with helping with getting dressed/ stretches before bed and before getting up. This is causing some animosity as I feel controlled as I can’t have an early night or a lie in without disturbed sleep. My caree doesn’t feel tired as I do (due to being less mobile) and can’t lie in too long as it caused some back ache. Coupled that most nights are disturbed too, to her having to get up for a wee in the night. I’m not looking for sympathy any of that crap, but practical solutions/ suggestions please. Thank you Jake


i have no intention of offering that sympathy crap…

i assume that you dont have help outwith the home? a physio could do the exercises-they do home visits. look at getting carers or volunteers for a few hours a week? take your superman cape off and ask for help in reality? (you have asked here-good first step!)

stretches can be done anytime in the 24hour day as long as a few hours apart-but physio will advise.

as for p’ing-contact ms or continence nurse?

theres lots of other help out there but you need to make ‘them’ aware that you need it.

are any of those suggestions useful? i hope so as its taken me ages to type this using my one eye and one finger!


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Hi Ellie. Many thanks for your reply. Lots of useful suggestions and some can be explored further. Sometimes the person needing the help needs to recognise their own limitations before realising what is out there. Hope you’re managing well with your own journey. Kind regards


‘Sometimes the person needing the help needs to recognise their own limitations before realising what is out there’

Very true. i refused to recognise my limitations for a year resulting in hurting those that care about me.

i wish that you both reach a doable solution.


  1. Does the caree receive DLA or PIP? These are benefits payable to people with disabilities to help them pay for care and transport. Contact the DWP

  2. Contact your County Council’s Adult section and ask what they can do for you and your caree.

  3. Contact your Local Authority/ Borough Council and ask the same question.

That’s all three levels of government who have a legal duty of care. You are not on your own.

  1. Book a holiday for yourself. It sounds as if you need one.

Best wishes,