Courtsey of Michael McIntyre:
“A good book is called a “page turner” – surely that is the minimum you expect from any book.”
“I bought my wife a beautiful diamond ring and I even had it engraved — with the price.”
"Who’s phoning radio stations to warn of traffic jams? Who in their right mind gets stuck and thinks: “Get me the phone — I must warn the others. It’s too late for me.”?
Hi, one of the best jokes I heard, was from John Bishop…the scouser with big teeth…but there is a certain something about him, that makes me think, Mmmm. Well, he was voted in one of those polls as being a hunk!
Anyway this is the joke, for those who havent heard it.
Mum says to dad, Have you had the conversation with our lad yet?
Dad, What conversation?
Mum, You know.....THE conversation.
Dad, No, I dont. What conversation? Im having trouble with THIS conversation`.
Mum, getting exasperrated, I said THE conversation, the one about the birds and bees.
dad, Oh, mmm, ok then he thinks to himself. How the ell do I do this? I know`.
So he rents a mild porn video and sits down with his son to watch it.
As the film gets going, his son looks embarrassed and dad realizes he has to say something…anything`.
So this is what he says,
To be honest, son, they arent usually that interested and they hardly EVER bring a friend!`
There, hope it wasnt too rude for anyone.
luv Pollx