I have hit rock bottom and can’t see my purpose in life. I was diagnosed with primary progressive 13 years ago. I have coped well over the years getting through losing my job my husband leaving bringing up my children myself getting them to uni ending up permanently in a wheelchair and now down to getting support from family to dress me toileting needs cooking etc . I can barely do anything and just feel a burden. I just can’t see a positive future and don’t know how to feel positive or happy again. I desperately want to but don’t know how to as I seem to have lost every part of who I was and feel very scared and lonely . How do I overcome these feelings and continue to try and carry on
Anyone who can advise love sairah
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Hi Sairah
It’s all too easy to compare yourself now with the old you - I know. I often find myself wishing wistfully for times past. Are there things you enjoyed that you can still do - singing, playing an instrument, drawing, creative writing, puzzles? Have you friends who will chat? What about a local MS group?
Do try to find something because you’re not useless. You’re loved and treasured.
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Hi Moirah I used to love painting but I just can’t get motivated. I really want to but just don’t know how to
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Tell you what, Sairah, why don’t you paint me a picture, take a photo of it’s and email it to me? I’ll give you my address when you’ve finished.
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If i am completely honest, what makes me feel better is knowing we all have an end one day, so I just live each day and try to enjoy myself because that day still comes.
With MS and its uncertain future having feelings like this is easy but knowing that there are people in a much worser situation still humbles me. You are still able to text, read and understand this, eat, drink, sleep and talk to people, paint!! Never over look whats in front of you, i wake up and am thankful for everything that can very easily be overseen. The sun rises and sets each day, enjoy them.
X
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You are right and I know that’s what I should think I usually do I just need to shake this negative feeling but everything I do just isn’t shaking it for some reason
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Ok I will have a go thank you
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Our purpose as far as Mother Nature is concerned is to pass our genes on. You have succeed, but some of us, me included, haven’t even managed that!
Beyond that, ‘purpose’ is a human invention and can be a rather oppressive notion when one is disabled, sick, frail, old or all of the above. On a purely utilitarian metric, people on those categories (including all of us) are basically a waste of air. So to the mischief with purpose and utilitarianism, say I. Let’s just enjoy the moment where we can and make the most of the miracle of being here.
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Hello sweetheart, I was feeling exactly like you are now last year.
I also had hit rock bottom after 23 years with PPMS…brought kids up, lost a job I loved and had coped well, then BAM!
My hand was losing it’s ability and having had no mobility for years, this scared me a lot. I have a great hubby and 2 good carers, who do everything for me.
I couldnt see a way forward. I was at the end of my tether.
Then something wonderful happened. Now this isnt for everyone and if it’s not for you, then I dunno what else to suggest.
I prayed for guidance and help. Jesus came to me and let me find my mojo again.
I now feel life precious and feel blessed every day.
much love Boudsxxx
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Hiya Sairah, oh I see you’re in that horrid dark pit and need some help to get out.
Quite a few of us visit that place but no-one ever intends to, we just sort of land there.
It’s not easy to get out of is it? Nothing worthwhile ever is. So here’s a few ideas you can try straight away.
Try this now… Look upwards, tilt your head & just look up wherever you are, for a few seconds. Make a mental note of everything you saw, then close your eyes and think of what you saw.
Then open your eyes and look again…is it any different? What can you really see now? There will be something different, any slight cracks?
Is there any light? Any colours? Any coving around the top of walls? A light shade? Any fancy lace or coloured patterns?
After you’ve looked up a few times you will find more & more little things that were there the first time, but you just didn’t see them.
You have actually seen a lot more than you thought.
This little exercise has shown that you saw things but you missed the full picture. As this thought sinks in, the first step out of that dark place is created.
Think of the warmth of people who love you.
They want you in their life, to share time together, make new memories & recall old ones, these invaluable thoughts of such unconditional love create another step out of the dark place.
Think of those whom you love, what each did to make you happy, your children on their first sports day, bike ride or Swim Certificate. Recall the swell of your heart, a mothers’ pure love bursting with pride.
Another step is created to ease you out of the dark.
Think of your last loud laugh, a long, warm laugh shared with others, yes you’ve created yet another step.
Now think of the freedom that your wheelchair gives to your body, isn’t it great?
My word, I think you have enough steps to leave that dark place and see the full picture.
If not, please keep looking in the same place until you see the full picture.
I truly hope it won’t be long before your spirits and mood lift. The hopeless & useless feeling will pass.
I’m so sorry for such a long reply,
Take care,
Chrissie xx
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Thank you Chrissie, I didn’t write the original post but this morning the dark place loomed large and I cried for an hour.
I just read your post and feel a little better. Thanks for helping me through another day.
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Hey P.B
You’ve made my day brighter, now my post may help others.
I’m not out of bed yet but you’ve put a spring in my step, figuratively speaking 'cos my foam mattress won’t like springs 
Chrissie x
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Morning Chrissie I’m just repaying the favour this morning. I hope you have a lovely day and it’s full of laughter.
Best wishes
Sam x
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