After the umpteenth little issue while trying to cook dinner I let rip (I thought quietly) with a small stream of invective…
Unfortunately my poor wife heard my little rant and came into the room saying she could not bare my foul language. I managed to stifle my reflex response which would have been “if that is the worst you have to deal with… Blah blah”
I realise that she has to put up with loads crap, but she does not need to put up with my poor behaviour.
I WILL TRY HARDER (failing that I will be quieter)
Mogace; I too have “issues” that I recognised as needing to be addressed. Or, as my wife put it, “If you carry on treating me like shit, I’m leaving you!”, type of threat.
I immediately grabbed the phone for an emergency appointment at my GP’s surgery (I still quite like her, even after 18 years). A few hours later a GP gave us a booklet entitled First Steps. This is an NHS publication promoting “emotional health”. and told us that she’d refer me.
Well, I’ve been around the block a few times and I know what that means. It’s about 18 weeks.
On our way out I passed our library and dived in. Emerging triumphantly with four books, which are: the Dummies Guide to Anger Management; Beat Stress with CBT; Choke, The Secret to Performing under Pressure; and, Learn to Meditate, which I can’t recommend more lowly. Yes, it’s got full colour illustrations throughout (like a child’s storybook) and a chapter on Out of Body Experiences. I had an oobe once which I put down to the bottle of Hungarian Bull’s Blood I’d knocked back earlier that evening (I was only 23).
Anyowh,
Since I’ve been breathing properly I’ve found myself much calmer. Sometimes I get up before Herself so I’ve got the lounge to myself for 15 mins. When I type “myself” actually it’s me and the cat. And our cat seems calmer too. Strange that.
I feel for each of you as it’s hard being the sufferer and the doting partner of one. However I feel a bit of sweary allowance should be made. Personally I swear a LOT, and am used to tempering it in front of the kids but the odd one slips out-we’re all human.
Isn’t it supposed to be essential catharsis? I’m sure I heard that a few years ago…
I do think I get a “sweary allowance” but if my bad time coincides with my wife having a “not so good” time positive attitudes get waved and stubborn hard heads get butted…
I also try to have “cathartic” time when she is out (then I need to try not to share too much catharsis with my neighbours!
My cat has his own bad moods and moments of feline |#{<?|€ miaow %|€~€$* and doesn’t wait till the house is empty to express himself either! And when my grumpy mood, the OHs bad temper and Montys (the cat not the husband) I’ll humour coincide, god help the neighbours!
Doesnt take much for me to swear nowadays. My husband doesn’t like it as he thinks it’s very unladylike but you have to do what you have to do to get the frustration of this crap illness out of your system. It’s either that or throw something which you usually end up having to clean up.
I find cats very therapeutic. We had to put down our old cat last month because of illness and we were heartbroken. However my youngest daughters cat is staying with us for a while and she has helped us heal. Our old cat was never very affectionate (we used to nickname him Victor after Victor Meldrew) but Lucy has such a sweet nature seems to know when you are feeling down. I am dreading the day she has to go home and really hope they forget to take her back.
Do you want ours? Although I have to warn you she has no concept of “give and take”. Cute though (for a maniac). One careful owner, low mileage, good condition, excellent mouser. Buyer collects.