Little things hard to cope with (not directly MS)

This afternoon, I had all my groceries delivered by ever such a nice, kind, polite couple of chaps from Ocado.

In fact, they were so nice, kind and polite, that I didn’t notice they’d forgotten to deliver about half the shopping, including some essentials I’m very low on, such as loo roll!

As there was a common theme that it was non-perishables like tins and loo roll, I reckoned it was probably a straightforward mistake of a crate or two not being unloaded, and that Ocado would bend over backwards to sort it out.

But of course, it meant having to spend 20 minutes in a phone queue, waiting to get through to them, then they wanted me to itemise everything that was missing - which was too many for me to do - I just said: “Loads of it! Everything that’s in the crates they didn’t unload!”

So he phones the driver, and confirms that yes, they’ve found it: it is “on the van”, as suspected. But of course “that driver has gone off shift now”, so can they send it round between 5 and 6?

That was better than I thought they’d say, which was “Tomorrow morning”, so I had no choice but to accept it, really.

Having to put a cork in it, for the moment, otherwise I’ll run out of loo roll.

But minor setbacks and misunderstandings like this seem to leave me feeling really defeated. I nearly cried that soup and loo roll haven’t turned up, when I haven’t cried about much bigger things. It just seems to sap all my energy. I’m cross with myself for not noticing, because it even went through my head that I didn’t seem to have much shopping for the money, and that it was all unloaded unusually quickly. But somehow it never dawned on me a load of it was missing. I’m not really cross with the chaps, because, as I say, they were so nice. But I wonder if I should have been cross, because being “nice” isn’t an awful lot of good if you don’t unload half the shopping, is it? I also wonder if I should have made more fuss about the “off shift” business, as he was obviously still with the van, and answering the phone.

If I learn I’ve made a mistake that affects a customer - or even if there has been one, but not by me - I’m not “off shift” until I’ve done something to put it right.

I just feel really exhausted, now, and all that’s happened is a few groceries went missing.

I suppose it was already a Friday, at the end of a long week, which meant I was tired to start with, then I always get tired carrying through and unpacking the groceries (the ones which did come), and then to find I’m still not done, but got to phone for the missing ones, and unpack that lot when they come. :frowning:

Sorry, bit of a pointless rant, really. I suppose I just want to know if other folks find stupid things are sometimes “the straw that broke the camel’s back”. I don’t seem to be able to deal with minor inconvenience. It’s not as if I was told I can’t have the groceries 'til after Christmas, or something.


Hi Tina,

I know just how you feel. Now I have MS I seem to feel as if I have to fight my own corner, even if I find myself stranding in a circle! I also find that I am more scatty now and realising this makes me more defensive. But I think that you were right to panic a bit when you saw your provisions head to someone else’s house. I feel more exposed at this time of year because we all know that the world will be shutting down any time soon.

I hope that everything soon sorts itself out quickly,

Take care,


Eee luv! Yes, it is just this kind of thing that leaves us frustrated, fagged out and angry too. Mainly, I think, because it`s all out of our control.

Putting shopping away is very tiring. Thats why I let hubby do it.but I know youre on your own, so that won`t help.

Are they going to compensate you for their error - nice or not!?

Will this put you off re-ordering? I have heard it also happens with Asda and Tesco deliveries.

My sister once had 3 lots of payment taken for a home delivered order!

Dunno what the alternative is, love.

So, hope the missing groceries do turn up very soon.

Still got yout legs crossed, have you?

I dunno!

luv Pollx

Thanks folks,

The missing stuff has turned up promptly - with an apology.

But alas, with no little “token” - which I’d hoped there might be - preferably one made of chocolate. :wink:

I’m now staring at another load of unpacking.

As it’s all non-perishable this time, I think I might go to bed for two hours, before I feel up to it.



Little things causing the emotional wheels to come off? Absolutely!

The proverb about the straw breaking the camel’s back is such a good one because it is so completely true. We soldier on through thick and thin and tough out all kinds of stuff and then something trivial catches us at a weak moment and its waterworks. I know that feeling so well!

Pour yourself a nice glass of wine, Tina, and I hope your weekend gets more relaxing.



Thanks Alison,

I’m glad I’m not going mad. It’s just weird when, rationally, I know something shouldn’t be a big deal, and yet I feel completely poleaxed by it. Guess it’s all part of the fatigue, otherwise I really am going nuts.

I’ve already downed a bottle (only a small one) of a new discovery: Kopparberg cider with elderflower and lime. Lovely, refreshing, aromatic drink. Feeling better already!



Hi Tina, you are not alone. I also find it is the little things that get to me. I think it is because the little jobs should be easy and are for a “normal” person but not for us. Would have been nice if they had brought you something, I like chocolate too, never mind, hope you enjoyed your cider. You’ll maybe need the toilet after drinking that cider so just as well you got the toilet rolls delivered by now, lol. I order on line with Tesco and have in the past, had some items not delivered like you did today. We don’t have Ocado this far north in Scotland. Cheryl:)

Hi Cheryl,

Yeah, I agree that the tolerance threshold just seems lower for us. It’s so frustrating when you know it should be easy, or used to be, but it feels like a flippin’ assault course.

I know none of the online grocery services are infallible - they all have unavailable items or weird substitutions sometimes.

But this is the first time anybody drove off with half the shopping still on the van. At first, I thought just a couple of things were missing, but couldn’t believe it as I unpacked, and realised more and more stuff wasn’t there. Then I realised they couldn’t have unloaded it all.

The irony was the delivery person actually had a trainee with him - which is why there two of them. So as he was supposed to be setting an example for the new recruit, it must have been quite embarrassing when he found out they hadn’t delivered everything they were supposed to.