Forum

Feeling quite depressed

Hi everyone

feeling quite depressed today, I had a bitter email from my sister in Australia. For those that know me I write a blog under the name of Amazon lady, well I write it and she interpret it with captions/picture, I then put it together and publish, I’ve put a link on this forum several times. Well after the email from her I’m thinking of shutting down the blog, she has started her own blog and what with looking out for our Mother after my Farther died 18 months ago, she feels that she’s under too much pressure to help me anymore with mine.

The email was very very hurtful, she went on about how nobody understands her, how she’s so stressed with looking after Mum , I phone Mum in Australia at least once a week she seems fine, I also call my sister sometimes twice a week and email not just about the blog but about alsort of things, even made her get a second email address just for the blog, but she does drink a lot and when that happens things turn nasty.

Today I’ve sent her a email, hopefully after a week since the email things might have calmed down, just telling her that I do appreciate what she does, but the email really hurt me, I ask her to send me an explanation so we hopefully can start again.

Just hope she answers.

thanks for listen guys all the best Deborah aka(Amazon lady)

3 Likes

Oh Deborah, that’s so sad, I do hope she replies and things get patched up, for both of you.

I, like you, have my only sibling (older sister) living in Oz for just over 40 years, but my Mum and Dad lived a mile from me, so when they became ill, I was the one looking after them, but I was lucky that my sister never did anything to make life more difficult for me, iin fact, she always felt guilty, even though I told her not to. If the boot had been on the other foot, I know she would have done the same, as willingly as I did.

I really hope she picks up the phone and explains why, as I for one, and am sure lots of others as well, will really miss your enjoyable blogs.

((((Hugs))))

Pam x

Hi Deborah, I think it would be so sad if you finished the blog. It is such a good blog!!! And I’m sure you must get a great deal of satisfaction from it.

I think the key to the problem is what you wrote…‘she drinks quite a lot’. I wonder if she wrote the email when drunk or hung over. Sounds as if she was having rant and directed it at you.

Sister relationships can be very difficult. I have two sisters, both older than me. We generally get on very well but occasionally things will flare up which I find very upsetting. Seems to upset me more than my sisters. They seem to get over it quickly and move on.

A year ago one of my nieces (one sister’s daughter) sent my other sister a really nasty email accusing her of being a trouble maker. It was all started over a Mother’s Day plan that fell through. Anyway, long story short, both of my sisters got over it quickly and quite honestly I’m still upset about it.

I think being so unwell with MS magnifies these things. If we were busy with work and social life etc it wouldn’t seem such a big deal.

I think maybe you should leave it for a while and see if she comes back to you and apologises. (What still upsets me about my situation is the niece never did apologise!).

I don’t think you should give up the blog. See if you can get someone else to help. Maybe ask on Everyday Living if someone would like to help?

Thinking of you hon,

Pat xx

3 Likes

Hello, Deborah.

I wrote a reply yesterday but it didn’t seem to post. It was the fault of this site or more likely my scrambled brain.

Family disagreements are never good. My younger brother disgraced himself a few years ago. As a result, he ended up owing me about £600. It was all a bit tetchy at first but paled into insignificance when he returned for my mum’s funeral and then had a couple of strokes over the next three years. Now we’re just glad to still be going and can give each other support, even though we’re about 300 miles apart. Not quite Australia.

Hopefully, if the criticism was made whilst under the influence she, might begin to thaw out once she’s realised. All we can do is our best and even though it may not be as much as we’d like it’s still all we can do. Surely that’s above reproach?

Sending you big hugs (((((((((((((((((((((((((((( :slight_smile: )))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Steve. x

2 Likes

Deborah don’t stop the blog. It is much better than the rubbish I write. Hope your feeling brighter

XXX Don

1 Like

Oh I forgot to say that you have actually inspired me to set up my own blog which I will use for various things including talking about life with the beast. Watch this space.

Steve x

1 Like

Sending you a bid hug familys are funny well mine are take care Jan xx

1 Like

I hope you don’t stop the blog Deborah!

Sending you a big hug…there’s nothing worse than family upsets…hope it soon resolves itself.

Thinking of you, take care, Nina xx

1 Like

Iv’e only just read your post, and feel so sorry that you are feeling depressed, We all love your blogs please keep writing them. I think family members can hurt you the most, please don’t let this get you down…hopefully its just temporary and she’ll realise that shes being unfair.

Michelle x

1 Like

Really sorry to read about this, Deborah. Yet another story where another family member says words to the effect of “I get tired too, I need as much help as you, why don’t you pull yourself together a bit?”

Well obviously our kith and kin do get tired and stressed and have a lot on their plate including doing things for us, but ultimately they can’t really appreciate how difficult everything is for us.

I hope you can manage to continue to do your blog with or without her help, but most of all I hope you and she can make it up and ease you out of your down feelings.

Love

Kev xx

1 Like

Hi thanks you are all so kind, the saying that comes to mind is" You can choice your friends but not your family" how true that is, I’m sure every family has spats at one time or another, its so good to get it of my chest here just writing it down helps and yes I will be the bigger sister, drink can make you say and do horrible things.

I will carry on with the blog as I do enjoy it, I will suggest my sister just dedicated one day a week to it. I’ll send her an email and try to help her where I can(not physically of cause Australia’s not just round the corner) I will try.

Thanks again guys I feel a lot better today, Deborah

2 Likes

Glad you’re carrying on

Sonia x