I generally try to be positive about the challenge of living with MS but I’m having a really tough time.
I had my bladder botox re done on the 5th July. It’s always been ok before but this time I had a lot of blood for two days. Next I got an infection and the first lot of antibiotics made me feel really very sick and ill. My mam had to man handle me to the doctors in a taxi and wheelchair on Friday, they refused to come out or do anything over the phone. They changed my antibiotic so at least I don’t feel sick anymore and I can eat but I feel much much worse than normal.
The heats not helping, I can’t sleep and when I get up on a morning I feel so hot and woozy I can barely move. I feel so tired all I can eat are pre made sandwiches, I live on my own so my poor mam who’s 68 is having to look after me. Add to this I’ve just had to switch to avvonex from rebif so I’m getting the side effects again and I feel so crap I don’t know what to do with myself.
My ms nurse says it’s just everything joining together that’s making me feel so bad and let’s face it she’ll know but in 13 years I’ve never felt so ill with it, lucky you some of you are probably thinking, and I know but I’m getting frightened that I’m never going to recover. I just want to feel a tiny bit better each day so I know I’m going in the right direction.
So there it is in all my self pitying glory. I promise I really am normally so positive I’m just having a horrible lonely time of it.