Im so fed up of people not understanding or pretending they do when they dont. I feel like im fighting a constant battle everyday with myself and with the people i love ive never been so lonely amd miserable.
my husband once had toothache but pronounced it to be neuralgia!
then one day he asked what i was moaning for.
i let rip - i’m not moaning, i’m groaning in pain.
then reminded him of how much pain he was in with his “neuralgia” and said “how would you like to carry your body weight on your face”.
my rant lasted a good half hour.
he went quiet then said that he had no idea i was in so much pain (huh - like i never said anything).
anyway i didn’t hit him with a brick at least!!
that is why this forum is so important.
you can let rip on here, you are among friends here.
hope your family see sense soon.
You’re never so lonely as when you’re amongst people who don’t understand you and your pain.
This forum helps lots of us to feel less lonely. We’re among friends here.
I think that it is nigh on impossible for other people to ‘really’ know or understand. Unless you give them a blow by blow minute by minute analysis they can’t possibly know how we are feeling and let’s face it that would be pretty grim for all parties! For me (and it is an ongoing battle-not something that I have mastered) it is about me acknowledging that they can’t know or understand (especially if I haven’t told them!) I know that because I look ok and generally say that I am ok they will think ‘shock horror’ that I am ok! I try to see the positive in that I ‘look ok’ means that firstly I haven’t yet become obviously physically disabled and because of that people don’t treat me like I am! I know that I cannot truly understand conditions that I have never experienced; I can try and imagine but I can’t really know. All I can do is be empathetic and wait for cues as how to help. I imagine that is how it is for our loved ones. I also imagine that because they ‘don’t know’ they are even more or at least as scared and alone as we are sometimes… still frustrating though!