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Feeling lost

Good morning I was diagnosed with ms almost 2 years ago and I am feeling so lost! My ms isnt bad where someone can see there is sonething wrong with me. My issues are with my vision and with my lack of desire to move or do anything. And also my sex drive has majorly diminished. My husband i have 4 children. Things are becoming very tense between my husband and I he just truely doesnt understand we fight more and more he says im lazy and dont do anything around the house because it takes me a while to motivate and before im ready to do the laundry or sweep the floor or do the dishes he has allready done it. From the moment i get up to the time i go to bed my brain is telling me that all i want to do is sit done i get up to play with the kids and 5 min later all i was to do is rest i have been sleeping in longer and longer making my husband very tired from getting up with the kids instead of getting up together or taking turn I feel so lost and I feel like my family is falling apart my husband just doesnt understand why im so ‘’ lazy ‘’ now he feels there is nothing wrong with me because my issues are mostly internal. I just dont know how to explain to him exactly how im feeling thanks for letting me vent

There are two MS Trust factsheets relevant to your situation. This is the first https://www.mstrust.org.uk/a-z/fatigue The second is possibly more relevant https://www.mstrust.org.uk/news/views-and-comments/describing-fatigue-others

The second one is about describing fatigue to others.

I hope you find them useful.

Sue

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Hello Sssue, There are pamphlets that you can request from ms society, also you could in your next appt with your neuro they have the same pamphlets in the waiting area.

unfortunately fatigue is one of the worst symptoms of ms so don’t despare most of us suffer with it. The trick is to have a short sleep for half a hour and you will feel you can keep going. Don’t try and fight it as you won’t win. Hopes this helps

Janet

x

Oh dear hun, your grieving and yes depressed. You have been told you have MS, you have young children and you just dont know what to do or where to start.

I think you need to make an appointment with your GP, and take your husband with you, and TALK this out. A lot of people dont get it. The trouble is you havent yourself. You dont understand what is happening and until you do how is your husband supposed too does that make sense.

Also now how old are the children you have 4 you say. Are any of them old enough to help a little make it into a game? If not then you do have an issue as the children have to be cared for.

So ok what can you do? Sit down and work out what you can do, and make up a timetable for the day, of things that wont wipe you out straight away. If you feel less tired at night put the washing on then. Talk to your husband. You see what he is doing is enabling you not to do it. He is doing it, so you have less incentive to bother which is making your depression worse.

so time to sit down and really talk to him. I would suggest the GOP as they can help too with fatigue.

You have to make a timetable that will work for you both. You need to pace yourself. So you get up and between you the chldren are made ready. You can have the breakfast organised at night so you know what has to be done. Work as a team. then when you have done the main things YOU then need to rest to recharge. He has to learn how to work with you now, your not the same.

You can do this together, he is frustrated with you, and doing the wrong thing.

So my advise to you is GP and councelling for you both family councelling. as you have children its really important for their sake they are in a safe and calm environment. so some of this is up to you hun. YOU CAN DO IT, you have been dealt a blow with this diagnosis, but you can learn to deal with it.

You can get help with direct payments, and have you applied for PIP? the extra money you could put towards a cleaner.

I hope you can sort this, big hugs. xxx

[quote=“Crazy Chick”]

Oh dear hun, your grieving and yes depressed. You have been told you have MS, you have young children and you just dont know what to do or where to start.

I think you need to make an appointment with your GP, and take your husband with you, and TALK this out. A lot of people dont get it. The trouble is you havent yourself. You dont understand what is happening and until you do how is your husband supposed too does that make sense.

Also now how old are the children you have 4 you say. Are any of them old enough to help a little make it into a game? If not then you do have an issue as the children have to be cared for.

So ok what can you do? Sit down and work out what you can do, and make up a timetable for the day, of things that wont wipe you out straight away. If you feel less tired at night put the washing on then. Talk to your husband. You see what he is doing is enabling you not to do it. He is doing it, so you have less incentive to bother which is making your depression worse.

so time to sit down and really talk to him. I would suggest the GOP as they can help too with fatigue.

You have to make a timetable that will work for you both. You need to pace yourself. So you get up and between you the chldren are made ready. You can have the breakfast organised at night so you know what has to be done. Work as a team. then when you have done the main things YOU then need to rest to recharge. He has to learn how to work with you now, your not the same.

You can do this together, he is frustrated with you, and doing the wrong thing.

So my advise to you is GP and councelling for you both family councelling. as you have children its really important for their sake they are in a safe and calm environment. so some of this is up to you hun. YOU CAN DO IT, you have been dealt a blow with this diagnosis, but you can learn to deal with it.

You can get help with direct payments, and have you applied for PIP? the extra money you could put towards a cleaner.

I hope you can sort this, big hugs. xxx

[/quote] PS. do you have a mother family etc, ask for their support and help too ok, on both sides. xxx You need to bring them all into play.