After 3 years of tests I was dx in August 2012 andI started dmds last month. I live on my own with my 8 year old son after my husband and I separated 3 years ago. The rest of my family live 100 miles away. During all of this time they have never called me to see how I am…it’s always been me calling them to tell them the developments. It really annoys me that when I do call my mum, she tells me that she called my brother (who lives near to her) to see how the kids were or to see how he is recovering after having ‘manflu’. What about calling me to see how I am coping or to see how her grandson is??? If the conversation does ever to me she always says how ‘such and such’ person’s neighbour has MS and they. Perfectly fine and that daily injections are just like someone with diabetes taking insulin. It’s really getting me down now…like my family just aren’t even bothered or care
Hi Amanda,many of us fully understand your situation and are living it as well.Everybodys’ experiences are slightly differently but personally and from what I’ve seen on here a main thread through it all is the guilt felt by mothers whose child has MS.I can’t remember(MS,middle age or morphine) if any of our esteemed membership ever got any sort of resolution.
Hopefully, when the sun bathing is boring an answer may appear.Everybody is blameless around MS,“It’s just the way the mop flops”,but that guilt will probably always be there without some kind of intervention.Your mother doesn’t have any guilt about your brother,so she keeps normal contact and has no idea what that does to you and your lad.
All I can say is for you to ask around MS Nurses and the like to see if there is a professional point of view,and if they’ve got any ideas.We get what is happening so this is the place to be to get support and find out what the weather is doing,
Wb makes a good point about a mother’s guilt. Personally I don’t think it’s that your family don’t care. What’s probably more likely is that your family are in denial about it, precisely because they do care. It’s painful to see someone we care about deeply suffer, and to hear about bad things happening to them - especially when there’s nothing obvious they can do to help. I know sometimes if my wife is struggling with some particular problem, I can often want to pretend it isn’t there, because I hate the feeling I get from seeing her hurt, and from feeling helpless to do anything about it. So no wonder that your mum seems more interested in hearing about your brother recovering from man flu, because that’s a small problem that can be easily overcome.
I’m not sure what to do about it though. Just giving it time may help, so that they can come nearer to a place of acceptance. And have you tried telling your family how you feel, or asking how it makes them feel that you have MS?
Sorry I can’t help more
Just a quick bunk, oops bump up,'cos there are two posts on here and we don’t want any waste of the big yellow thing