I’m pooped. Really, deeply tired. My arms feel like a wet muppet and I’m doing my best to pace…but it is so hard to quiet that monkey mind. You know how children go crazy at bedtime, burning off the last of their energy before dropping asleep in the blink of an eye? That’s what my brain seems to be trying to do. Napping is hard, so I alternate physical activity (conquering the washing up) with mental activity (posting this). Tinnitus robs ne if silence and as much as I know that I need to meditate, to just BE, it is hard.
I begin my CFS/ME group therapy in a month’s time, which is at least something. A little further on and I’ll be seeing a neurologist again and hopefully answering the question I keep asking myself, ‘Is this MS?’ That in itself is mentally and emotionally draining, but I can’t stop it echoing around my head.
So, I’ve accepted that I’m a ‘Spoonie’ but some days, I need company from others who really understand and I’m happy to do the same in return. How pooped are you?