Exaggerating

Has anyone ever exaggerated their symptoms to get out of doing something or to get sympathy?

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Yeah all the time . Going the bar when its my round, feeling tired when football is on . We have to get some benefits of having MS !!

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No, and prefer to keep doing what I can, because I may not always be capable. I am sure sympathy would be lovely it it actually solved anything, but it doesn’t, and therefore utterly pointless.

Each to their own though.

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No. Don’t need to.

Sue

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No, I’ve always played it down not up.

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No. Quite the opposite.

Fck MS and fck making excuses.

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no.

i know how bad it gets so no need to exaggerate. (3 friends are no longer here)

not sure how to exaggerate double incontinence, loss of sight in one eye, speech difficulties and total right sided weakness…

no wonder we dont get much understanding from joe public eh?!

ellie

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Why ask ? are you saying that’s what you do ?

No. I’m the opposite. I always say “I can do it” even if I can’t. I’ll always give it a go.

I am always being told by both professionals and family/friends. “Just sit down. You have got MS”. Really annoying, Well meant but annoying.

Shazzie

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No way.! Onwards and upwards and go round it if you can’t get over it I say!!

Like someone says, why is that what you do?

I agree with Whammel too.

Probably get myself into trouble for saying I will try and do too much. However, there may be a long time ahead of me when I can’t do things so prefer to keep blasting through (or stumbling through more appropriate to me!).

Anne

x

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I will admit that I do occasionally come over with the “Oh poor wibbly me” routine when I am trying to get my husband to make me (yet another!) cup of tea but all’s fair in love and marriage!

Actually, he usually is the one telling me to stop trying to do things that I really know are too much for me out of sheer bloody mindedness. With hilarious results as they used to say about old situation comedies!

With other people I do tend to play things down and claim that everything is fine and I can manage - which is another form of exaggeration or lying of course.

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Hi Boblatina

That is what I do . I “play up” with my friends, but nine times out of ten they don’t believe me and tell me to do it anyway ! I like that I can have this playful banter with people who know I have MS . Obviously there is a time and place when this should be done . But hey its harmless fun .

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No but I do get really frustrated and grumpy when I try to do something and it’s getting the better of me and then someone buts in and finishes it off or says I saw you struggling , I could have done that for you. Like they would dare.

Mags xx

No but I am secretly relieved that I have a valid excuse for not dancing…

Mick

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Ironically I wish I could dance and only have to deal with my healthy shy embarassment…

… that’s the way the cookie crumbles

M

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what a noble lot - apart from ‘honest’ Ant no one ‘uses’ their m.s. to get what they want!

Do I use my m.s. - all the time! - gardening cause muscle spasms - the thought of decorating is overwhelming - cooking gives me arm ache etc etc.

another question - 'Do you think other people think you ‘use’ your m.s. to get what you want or to get out of doing something?

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WTF Krakowian are you getting at here?

Why don’t you just spell out what you mean? In what ways do you ‘use’ your MS? And why do you feel that all the rest of us are deceiving ourselves/other people about the extent to which we use our disability to get what we want or to evade things we’d rather not do.

I suspect that most of us, most of the time, underplay our disability. We try to do more than we’re really capable of. We get extra fatigued by attempting to do things we used to be capable of easily. We struggle to dress ourselves, feed ourselves, keep our houses clean, take care of our OHs and/or children. Etc, etc, etc.

Many of us are significantly disabled and yet we don’t want to disappoint our families, friends, colleagues so we try to do more. We also underplay, who hasn’t answered the question “how are you?” with the words, “fine, well I suppose I’ve been having a bit of a relapse just lately, been feeling like I need at least two hours sleep each afternoon, can’t really walk. No, I suppose not fine really!”

Personally I’ve had to train myself out of the habit of entering my GPs surgery and answering that very question, “how are you?” with “fine”!

And I don’t believe that the people who know me well would consider that I ‘use’ MS as an excuse for anything.

Feel absolutely free to accuse me of being deceptive, dishonest or anything else you feel.

Sue

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Despite the seemingly sar-car-stic trolling from the OP of this thread…

I consider myself fortunate, in that my condition fails to impact upon my life significantly and i am thus able to perpetuate my preferred attitude of denying the accuracy of my diagnosis.

To indulge this disease to the extent of using is as an excuse, would merely be an act of embracing the disability most would presume we are condemned to suffering.

By using MS as an excuse to avoid doing those things you are quite able to you, you embrace the mentality of a victim, whilst cheating those who need to take up the burden (however slight it might be) which you elect to shrug off.

For shame.

As i originally said, ‘quite the opposite’; fact is, when symptoms arise which might reasonably excuse me from such and such an activity, i perceive it as a challenge to raise my expectations of myself, rather than an opportunity to be a slouch.

As for whether others think i use MS as an excuse? why should i care?

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most of us suffer from fatigue/lack of energy which limits what we are able to do on a daily basis.

Do we therefore do the things we prefer doing and not do the tasks/chores we dislike?


We may find doing basic things difficult/exhausting and we may rightly congratulate ourselves on what we do each day. However it doesn’t follow that family or colleagues see things in the same way. Recently a work colleague complained that I was lazy. In fact it was nothing short of a miracle that I actually got into work at times.

But was I lazy?

The point i’m making is that our perception of ourselves may be very different to how those around us perceive us.

Hi Krakowian

In answer to your question about whether I think people use my MS . Again yes absolutely . Long standing joke amongst my friends that I always use MS as an excuse . I have to take a very light hearted approach to my MS , if I didn’t I would be sat rocking in a corner driving myself crazy. On the flip side people who know me, know when I am being serious and am not able to do something because of my restrictions . There are many things I could do to make my life easier . Getting a Blue Badge for example, would make my life an awful lot easier . But you know what, I can cope without one for now, and will only get one if/when it becomes absolutely necessary .

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