Forum

Understanding

I currently have a problem, some of my friends have helped in the past, sorry for posting anon but when you read you will see why.
My daughter has come home from uni, she is being awkward and is constantly arguing. This is stressing me out and when she argues I get pins & needles all over and get worse.
I have just got script for dizziness tabs, got to get em yet
I go out she es ot believe y condition.
Personally I do not give a sh** if she does or not, I just want stress to stop. I am newly DX and the stress is making me worse.
If I not done out, I normally do despite, i have not wrong with me
If I am feeling poorly n not do wot he moans at e.
I kow it not a bed of roses for my wife, but I do what I can,i do not lie in bed all day, I do too help, I am sick of justifying myself

Hello Annon.

Firstly babe stress is the worst thing for MSers it make our condition worse.

Do you have a support worker or a listening GP or friend you can chat to about your problems and if they can help in any way other than putting your daughter over your knee and spanking her bottom.

What does your wife say about these situations and your MS?

Charlie,x

Anon,

How newly diagnosed are you?  It will take a while for everybody (including you) to adjust.  There's lots of information on this website that you can print off and show to your wife and daughter - sometimes it's easier to explain or start a discussion that way.  I was 16 when my mum was diagnosed with MS, so a bit younger than your daughter, and I'm sure I must have been a trial at times, but that's what MS does - some clever person likened it to dropping a pebble in a pond and the ripples are the effects spreading out.

I hope you find a solution to your current problems,

Luisa x

Oh you poor thing, stress is definately something you can do without. Have you got a ms nurse, or maybe see a councillor who would be able to help you. It is very hard to come to terms with and you need all the support you can get. It will take time, but it does get easier. Have you sent off for some free brochures from the ms society, they explain things which you in turn could show your daughter then maybe she will be more understanding and stop rowing with you.

I hope things settle down for you very quickly

Janet

x

Hi anon so sorry you have all this stress at the moment I really feel for you. Would your ms nurse, if you have one, be able to talk to your wife and daughter it might help. Perhaps they are in denial and find it hard to know how to feel about there husband and dad. Hope things get better for all of you, sending hugs Karen x

Hi

I have been dx 4 weeks. I have ms nurse I wanna change-not follow through on help promised. " thanks for listening"
My GP rings me every 3-4 days to see if I am ok. Has arranged shrink for me as I am struggling to accept this.
Parent/sisters not helping much seems that can’t be ard. Seen mum x2 in 12 weeks and 1x sister once the other x 0- fret family
Problems with relationship
Over all seriously pi
*d off
I accept what I got and outward generally appear strong. Main reason discharge from hospital early-consultant sed I had “right attitude” can’t see it. I normally “speak” to my friends here and offer advice/support/signposting where I can-that’s a help, like this. Like minded people

Thaks for “listening x”

Hiya Anon

What I am about to say may not be popular with some-so be it..........................

Your daughter argues when shes at home-with herself? I am assuming you. So dont reply. I dont say that lightly-trust me. I had my eldest daughter pinned against the wall ready to punch her-I didnt. But I was so frustrated with our constant bickering-it affected us all (am single Mum of 4) It scared me that I had reacted like that-so I knew that I had to find a way of coping. Its easy to become self centred-without being aware of it. Why are my family always argueing with my? Why have all my friends deserted me? Why do I feel that I have to justify all that I do, or cant do? Common denominator? You! What is happening is happening but we all view it differently. An example, thats a hideous top that you are wearing today. Huh, but you think its gorgeous! Fact, the top is the top, its our opinion and feelings towards the top thats causing the problem-NOT the top. This can be likened to ANYTHING, any situation.

I truly hope that you understand what I am saying here. Changing your view will help you cope-if your mind is strong and focussed on you (thats not in a selfish way, not at all, but a caring way, to stop the suffering that you are experiencing) then it will affect the whole household-it changed mine.

There is support available, on here, counsellors and an abundance of other help but at the end of the day (every day!) you are the one living with MS and so its essential that you find a way of coping, your way. That will be different from my way and every other person on here. There may be similarities, which is comforting knowing that you are not alone, but none of us have to learn how to 'manage' your MS and your family!

And finaly, give yourself a break, you are not Superman, I say that cos I thought I was Wonderwoman!

Got brain strain now after that thinking, cuppa time, wanna join me?

Take care to all thats read this-have a happy day!

Ellie x

 

 

Thanks Ellie I see where you are coming from, if it's popular or not so be it, but you have put a different perspective on it thanks. Time for a kit-kat

Ah wee, I didn't do the anon thing quite well, pressed wrong button, didn't manage to put brain in gear. A big thanks to you all. Mike x

Hiya again

Mods will sort the Anon thing if u want-just report your own post.

As for Kitkats-as you must have been typing that I was putting 2 packets of them in my car! Am helping organise a womens conference for Saturday and thats my contribution. However, they wont miss 2 >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> catch! (Throws Anon a biccy!)

Ellie x

Hi Elli Good shot!!! Mike x

 Bet your feeling better already Mike!!! I can guarentee everyone on here knows where you are coming from! I use mind over matter, " I dont mind & it doesnt efin matter!!!!" Dont let em get you down & Ellie, I,d love a kit kat! LOL!! Tracey xx 

Throws Tracey a kitkat-anyone else? I can replace them tomorrow! LOL

Ellie x

Cheers Ellie!! Hope youve got a bumper pack, youve started something here!!!!! Tracey xx

Tracey

I know the pleasure a kitkat gives me so why would I want to keep them all to myself?! Sharing the good stuff is essential!

*thinks, its now lunch time, will have a kitkat for afters!

E xxx

Looks like a visit to Te*sco will be required! thumbsup

Hi
Thanks to you all cont beat chocolate

Mike