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Why oh why

Im not sure why I always cry when my family help me out went shopping yesterday with my husband and me just to get me outta the house came home i was so outta of it went to take my jacket so off we have this foot stool went to sit on it and almost feel off of it my daughter of just 15 caught me before i hit the floor good I love my family. sorry bout the rambling just in a getting use to how this disease changed me knew i had it for years but never affected me untill now. Thanks for hearing my piy me story.

Bea

Hi Bea, There are thousands of people just like you today. As MS chips away at bits of our life it’s only natural to get feelings of frustration, resentment, anger and depression. We don’t have a good way of being able to express these feelings because we’re always being told to “Don’t make a fuss” or “Cheer up - it may never happen”. MS makes other people feel uncomfortable and we are always trying to find ways to hide it. This means that we are bottling up our feelings, but sometimes they overflow, like a pan of boiling milk. We can’t help it. It’s natural and healthy to get these things out of your system so don’t try to stop it. It takes a while to adapt to the new you. Best wishes, Anthony

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Thank ou so much Anthony you said it perfect im doing my best to get use to the new me its just so hard but thank you for udersanding me my husband is a good man but doesnt really understand it as you said and he may never but thats okay as long as he is by me.

Bea

Hi Bea,

You have got that exactly right.

As long as your husband is trying to be as good as he can, it’s not important that he can’t really understand what you’re going through.

If he supports and helps you that’s pretty good.

Anthony

He does thats why i say im a luckiest woman to have in my life alot of others may of throw there hands up in the air and left now/

Bea

hi bea

you are entitled to as many pity parties as you want or need.

i plan an occasional pity party and it starts off fine but after a while i get bored and have to get out of my pit and sit with my husband and the random drunks he brings home with him, have a drink, a chat and a laugh.

so enjoy the pity party but when you’ve had enough - go for it!!

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Bea,

Lots of wise and experienced words above. Everyone has to try and deal with the horrid issues that MS chucks at us. Some days it might be easy to smile ,laugh and shrug, whilst other days can feel like being in the deepest and darkest pits. If we can share some of the good or bad stuff with a loved one (whether they fully understand or not) it makes things a bit easier knowing that someone cares.

It can also be useful to tell it like it is here in the forums, because there is a high chance that people here will understand and not judge.

Wishing you all the best

Mick

Bea, hugs…

i can imagine how it feels to have your daughter ‘save’ you. We try and protect our children from the bad stuff. I’ve got to be honest, although I miss mine (they are both at uni) I am glad they are not at home, just so they don’t see my ‘bad moments’.

ok, as I am me…

Maybe you did a little too much. It’s great that you got out. But for you it was too much ? So next time do you need a coffee ?

Do you need a loo break ( 5mins sit down). (Would seem normal to most men) lol

​or, just a ‘treat coffee/ coke / beer’ somewhere on the way home to recover.

P.s. I work full time, but a trip to ‘town’ was too much, but, I have found a way ! I go for near lunch time. At the point I start to feel tired I say I’m starving. This results in half hour sit down. We only do 2 hours parking so not too much more walking around. With no need to say…I feel shit

Sarah the problem was we were our getting easter stuff for our 7 year i just have to go to one store not 2 thinking all will be good.

Bea

Yeah tonight i will have a beer put i dont pity my self just try and forget my problems.

Bea

You are so right Mick posting in this group really has helped me a lot to know there are others with this MonSter helps me cause im not alone.

Bea

I think we all try to ‘protect’ our family and friends and that is difficult at times as we are to some extent ‘hiding’ ourselves from them and this is emotionally draining. I sometimes wonder if we take too much on ourselves in presenting a false persona where we appear all singing all dancing whereas in reality we are feeling totally crap/unwell. If we ‘hide’ our real feelings where do we get support from because we appear not to need support.

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That is so true I tend to hide how I feel or how im doing to protect my family I some how have to learn how to drop that persona .

Bea

Look on the bright side Bea. You DID get out and to the shops. Your family are supportive. Your trip/fall was inside and not in public!

Thanks yeah i thought the same and i know i need to get out being in the house 24/7 does tend to drive one crazy

hi bea

that’s the spirit. (if it doesn’t work try a different spirit - i like gin)

you seem more upbeat now.

occasionally if i go to the local shop i get hugged by people who live round here.

why i ask.

they say “you’re so strong” i reply “not much choice”.

however it gives me a lift and makes me want to continue being this way.

maybe a night in the local pub is in order.

now that will be a tale to tell.

carole x

Well the pub is home but thats okay cause if i fall at least it is at home lol

Bea