MS Society UK | Forum

Concerned about Partner

I have been in a great relationship for four years.We do not live together.How can I break the news about my MS diagnoses,it will change her life as well as mine.Im tempted to end the relationship to spare my girl but it would hurt me so much.Anybody else had a similar dilemma?

Oh no the NOBLE GESTURE…

Do you love your GIRL? If you do your doing her an injustice really. Is she so shallow she would just throw you over if you told her you have been diagnosed with MS. NOTHING much will change, you may find that for several years you go along nicely. Life can change for many reasons.

You could be married to your GIRL RIGHT, and she gets sick what would you do?

I got married for 30 years and my partner was more sick then I was, he had COPD and other issues. We became a team we would share each others opposites. so we muddled along nicely for several years until sadly i lost him.

Being in love and a relationship is an amazing feeling. Its sharing our lives with someone, the GOOD, the BAD and the UGLY, most relationships will go through these.

Just trust her. What will be will be.

2 Likes

That is a very tough call. Any life changing illness affects many others as well as the person with the condition. I was married when I became ill but did suggest to my wife that she might want to cut and run. That was about 30 years ago and we are still doing ok. She said to me "how would you feel if the roles were reversed?
Without 20/20 foresight / hindsight it is almost impossible to be certain of the right way to go.
There are some good videos on the shift.ms website about discussing the issues involved in speaking with partners.
Wishing you both all the best.
Mick

1 Like

Brilliant response CC

1 Like

Most of us have been in our own version of this difficulty. Let’s put it this way: it’s a highly effective short-cut to finding out whether your partner is a keeper.

If you have not already shared with your partner how things are for you, then you need to take a deep breath and do it. Maybe your relationship will not survive. But give the woman some credit; she might be an absolute trooper and you’ll find yourselves growing ever closer. I think you owe it to your partner to treat her as your partner - i.e. involve her and talk together about how you two see yourselves navigating things. Good luck. I am sorry about your dx.

2 Likes

Hi, I’m echoing what others have said, but here goes;

if your love for each other is true, then dont cut your nose off etc chuck.

Life is still enjoyable and worthwhile after MS.

My hubby and I celebrate our golden wedding anniversary in March and 24 of them have been shared with MS.

We dont like it, but there’s nowt we can do about it.

Boudsxx

2 Likes