Carer with Mental Health Issues Seeking Advice

Hello everyone, I am just new to the whole MS experience. I have read what MS is. I would like to help the patient when I can.

In the meantime, I have severe mental health issues. After I come back from visiting the patient, I get mentally exhausted and severely depressed. I don’t get support for feeling that way. Everyone around the patient is stressed, caring for him because they feel the agony of the patient and feel hopeless that we can’t make it easier for him. The patient seems depressed, saying he has given up. He does not look after himself, eating junk food and drinking alcohol.

His negativity affects my mental state because I am struggling every single day. I know that his negativity is MS-ruled. Unfortunately I don’t have the shield to bounce it off yet.

Do you have any advice how I can better care for him, without my metal health being so affected? Thank you in advance for reading my message and offering your wisdom.

Sorry to hear about both situations. Try contacting your local Carers Support: https://www.carersuk.org They are set-up for carers and not the people that they’re caring for. Support is out there. Take care and good luck.

Thank you for taking the time to comment on my thread. I will check out the link. Have a blessed day xx

Hi anonymous. I struggle with mental health and like you I find it hard when my friend hits a negative pothole. Maybe take a step back and consider is it the MS or self pit? Motivating my friend is hard and he explained it is the only choice he has i. e not washing changing clothes eating biscuits not food. I cannot change his mindset so each visit is the equivalent of mental Olympics and it is exhausting. Please find time for you. That is what will make you stronger. All the best

Dear Justme, thank you for your reply. I am so sorry for my delayed reply. I read your message many months ago and I received comfort from your message. So thank you so much. I hope you and your friend have been managing okay under the current climate. Best wishes.

Hi, I have had carers coming in for 9 years.

I consider myself a good employer.

But carers, just like their carees, are human…with human problems and worries.

I take on their worries. I would rather they didnt tell me in quite so much detail how their lives are. But the relationship between a carer and myself do become quite intimate and a bond grows.

If you are employed in a caring role, your charges will have serious medical issues and this means you need to be strong enough to cope with their issues. If you feel your own health issues are made worse by your chosen occupation, would it be an idea to change direction?

Boudsx

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