Never pour paraffin on your toes and then try to strike a match, else you could end up like the Pobble who had no toes (for those who like Edward Lear).
it does look dangerous
No idea what is going on here but if it did involve Toe nails and Malt thingy’s it could be foggin’ catastrophic
M
So what did I go and do …?
did it involve malt?
Oopsie! ‘And she said it’s a fact the whole world knows that Pobbles are happier without their toes’.
Doesn’t everything?
That’s not what I was told on the surgical ward.
Ah! Perhaps you were treated by a conflation of confused consultants.
There are already too many cons in this thread.
M
Now then. Time for some sensible talk.
Number one, don’t mix paraffin and flames. Number two, never involve you own body parts in an experiment. If you don’t know what the result will be, don’t do it if your toes are involved. Remember, we have toes, they are important. Just ask someone who’s had them chopped off to ask why. Even when we can’t walk properly, it’s better not to experiment with your feet.
Enough about feet. Number three, stop following each other’s dodgy, foggy brainwaves. For example, someone mentions feet and paraffin in the same post. Someone else thinks ‘oh I could google that’ (mentioning no names). Then posts a picture or a diagram showing the results. Another someone thinks, ‘oh I could better that’, sets fire to their own feet and all they can say to explain their behaviour is ‘oh dear’.
So let’s be clear, experimenting using ones own body is silly. That includes long ears Flopsy my friend. I know you have more than the average length of ear, but still!
§ue (entire of body, never having utilised it for experimentational material, even if what’s left is a bit crap!)
Sue
will you give them a stern talking to please.
i said that i was given liquid paraffin as a child (yuck yuck yack!) it was given as a medicine (don’t ask me what for).
no way would i put it on my toes, flammable and i have spent a small fortune on my tootsies recently.
carole xx
Fear thee not, Sue - I would never attempt to set fire to my long ears - they are my pride and joy! They do occasionally have to be professionally hoovered out though, 'cos my old Dyson just ain’t up to the job any more.
Can anyone help with a clue from the crossword in the Times today (not the cryptic one)? The clue is: Albrecht - artist (5) I just can’t think what it could be.
Plonk ?
basic questions - what exactly is malt and what was it supposed to do to us? and there was that ‘iron tonic’ - on no account was the stuff to touch your teeth (it would rot them!)so you had to lean back as a ‘kind parent’ (apologies for the - in my case - oxymoron) would pour it down one’s gullet. Malt and iron - nay wonder we got m.s.!
And there was me thinking it was either Durex or Smith. Durex worked with one of the other answers, but I felt sure it was Smith. I’ll try and put Plonk in and see if it helps.
Thanks.
§ue
Malt is germated wheat or sprouted wheat, it gives beer and vinegar it’s flavour. My bakery training comes in handy sometimes.
Kay
I must have been neglected as a child. I was never given malt, iron tonic, paraffin (what were your parents thinking?), delrosa (whatever that is), wormwood (again, what?), or in fact vicks.
§
No, paraffin and bunny ears don’t go any more than paraffin and feet. Professional cleaning of your ears, how posh. Is there a bunnyticians where you go for a special buffing up session?