Hi Everyone

Would really appreciate if if you could help me out with a problem we’re having.

My Mum has primary progressive for 20 years and can no longer walk more than a few steps. My parents have been coping at home with carers but my Dad is now 70 and they need some extra help (technology, more care?) and I need help in understanding what is possible.

For bath times, they use a commode as a wheelchair to get close to the bath and then mum transfers to a bathchair that lowers her into the bath. She likes baths but has passed out a few times after getting out and Dad no longer feels strong enough to be able to get her to a lying down position as the docs advise when this happens. Once when in hospital she tried a bath hoist and really didn’t like that. She’s equally not keen on a wet room shower. Has anyone had good experience with these options or found alternatives?

The carers who visit only tend to do 30min visits and it takes my Mum a very long-time to get ready for and get in and out of a bath. Maybe 60-90mins. Has anyone ever used a private caring service for this or had carers who would do a long visit?

Sorry, first time poster so if this has been posted previously please point me in the right direction.

Thanks in advance for any help, D

Hi Dom

It sounds like a rather worrying situation. Often people with MS react badly to heat, and this might be the case with your mother, laying in a hot bath could be contributing to her passing out.

Have you had any input from Social Services or an occupational therapist as to what solutions might work for your parents? In my area (West Sussex) we have a Community Neurological Team which has OTs as well as physiotherapists etc. Perhaps you could find out what’s available in their area (ask their GP?) and contact them for help.

I can’t help but think however much you like baths (I’d love a bath but I haven’t had one for about 8 or 9 years!) ultimately a shower is a better option for the disabled. There are different types of shower available, there may be options which your parents wouldn’t object to so much.

With regard to the carers doing 30 minute visits, if this is a service provided by the local authority, then maybe you need to arrange for your parents care plan to be reviewed?

It all sounds like you’ve reached a point at which a review over how your Mum and Dad are living, coping, being cared for is needed. It must be hard for you to deal with.


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Yup, I agree with Sue.

It sounds like your mum needs a re-assesment. The bathtime visits are obviously not long enough now.

If your parents are paying for your mum’s care, then they will probably have to pay more, depending on their income/ outgoings.

I pay for care with direct payments. I use both agency and council payoll carers. The agency charges double what I pay on payroll.

There are plenty of agencies, but do some research before using them, as there are some very bad ones.

Pm me if you like.


Thank you both for your help.

Thank you both for your help.

I’d agree. Ring social services and ask for a re-assessment. They can also put you onto a occupational health therapist, with regards to the practical issues of bathing.

It may be that a wetroom /shower or a bath seat over the bath is the answer. Mom might not like it, but tell her the important thing is to be clean and a bath is becoming unsafe - for her and for carers (whether dad or paid ones)

As for the 30 mins rule - that pretty standard - social care is being squeezed everywhere. It may be that you have to employ carers for a longer visit out of their own money (your parents that is).