Aw Lizzie. This is a sad state of affairs. It is obvious how much you are hurting. I wonder if your hubby is hurting just as much, but cant find the words to tell you.
I have often wondered when it is the fella of a couple, who is the one struck down by something as chronic as MS, how much worse it must be. This is because traditionally, it is the male who is supposed to be the strong one, the providor, the protector. As all us girls know, we still love and cherish our men even though this awful thing has happened.
But I know in my case, if it had been my OH who had needed help the same way I have, to dress him and do all the personal care needed, he wouldnt have taken it half as easily. Infact he really shocked me one day, when he was wiping my bum,
If I ever need this kind of help, lll top meself`. I was an still am hurt by his words.
When we set out on life`s great highway as adults together, we never envisaged that path taking such a terrifying turn like it has with MS or other cruel illnelsses, but we cling on to the hope that the person we chose as a long term partner, will be there for us whatever comes along and slaps us in the face.
But it seems that sometimes, some of us don`t expec that other person to shoulder our problems. They must want to protect us from the worst times and they shun us in doing so.
So Lizzie, if you can find a way to let your man know you are still in love with him, things will be ok
Maybe you can put it into a letter, eh?