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Running 2 marathons on support of my GF and MS society

Hi I’m looking.for some help as the title says I am planning (hoping.to plan) a fundraising event. I have mentioned in a previous post about a woman that I fell for who is suffering from MS. Ideas looking at ways to support my GF through the issues that she is dealing with due to her MS. Our relationship is not happening at the moment (gf broke it of partly due to ms) we both love each other and I think she.is the world. As we are both hockey fans I would like to run 2 marathons one on one day.and another on the next day on a route between our favourite hockey club (breahead clan) and our rivals (fife flyers) the distance Is around 62 miles in total. What I would like to know is some assistance with logistics etc and how is the best way to collect sponsorship etc Any help would be appreciated Jamie

Sorry I’m not much help with any advice, but wish you good luck and hope you achieve your goals. Also that you and your girlfriend can get things sorted.

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Oh, please think again about this.

I know you have honourable motives, and it’s terribly heroic, but don’t you see you will be placing your gf under huge emotional pressure to get back with you? If you want to help the Society, then by all means make a donation to them in secret, but please don’t leave your poor gf thinking she owes you, because you’ve half-killed yourself for her, and for MS, by running two consecutive marathons.

One thing people with MS don’t want to feel is indebted - that we’ve got to stay with someone because they’ve done soooo much for us. If you start devoting your life to MS, it’s like sending a message to your gf that she now owes you a reward, and that’s a terrible pressure to be under - pressure is not good for MS. If you want to help out, do it quietly, don’t even tell your gf, and definitely don’t do anything that’s going to lead to a big fanfare, and probably a piece in the local rag etc. She’s going to feel like a right cow if she still doesn’t want to get back with you after all that - and that isn’t really fair, is it?

Tina

x

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Why is it wrong to do something like this? I have always wanted to do something that will push myself to.the limit. I.know it seems like pressure but how else can I help? I want to do.good for people and.especially for her. If I raise alot of money then.that’s good or am.I.missing something xx

Dear Jamie,

If you would like advice or ideas about fundraising for The MS Society, please get in contact with the fundraising team. You can find out more here:http://www.mssociety.org.uk/get-involved/fundraising.

Stewart (admin)

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If the roles were reversed, and you were the one that was ill, do you think you’d like you’d like to feel you’d become her new charity project, instead of her equal partner?

Of course it’s not wrong to raise money for charity, but think about how she will be feeling. Have you discussed this plan with her, and is she happy about being your good cause? It is to support her that you claim to be doing this, after all, so isn’t it important how she feels? And would you expect her to feel impressed and grateful afterwards, so that it’s hard for her to speak out if she doesn’t want to resume the relationship?

This is the equivalent of: “Look at all I’ve done for you!” You can’t buy her back by doing good deeds for MS. You’ll just put her in an awkward position, where it looks mean if she doesn’t take you back, even if it’s not really what she wants.

Can’t you just give her the space she’s asking for, and not try to “do things” for her? Very few of us get misty-eyed about being a charity case. It’s not romantic.

Tina

Hi Jamie,

It is good that you wish to raise funds for the MS Society, by completing 2 marathons and sponsorships. I use to run marathons and half marathons, when serving in the army.

Entrance fee’s were paid for me by the army, so as to keep the army in the public eye. After a while I was able to raise more funds for various charities by increasing my numbers and having more people run, after a year we had a team of 8 runners.

If you can you would need a support team , to collect and organise your kit arrangements before/after the event. Transportation also needs sorting.

The most difficult task is the donations, the charities can give you sponsorship forms, t shirts and assistance,but you need to be prepared to contact loads of people/family/friends/works that is the problem. At first, people need to get use to you, companies will sponsor you after a few races and that you are serious about continued running events, they would insist you where their logo to advertise their support for your charity.

Talk to the MS Helpline they will be able to give you advise on fundraising.

Hope all goes well, Andy

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You are speaking only for yourself there Tina and not all MS sufferers of course.

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You go for it.

If you don’t you will be forever wondering should I.

At least she may appreciate how much you think of her and if she doesn’t respond well you tried.

Ronin.

in no way is the woman a charity case! rather my inspiration to be a better person and to do what ever i can to help people that are suffering.

The woman is an amazing person and although our relationship may have ended for now, she has left a mark on my heart that will never be removed.

I do not know what the future holds (none of us do) but i can not sit back and mope about thinking, i would rather do somthing.

thanks

Just wanted to say good luck Jamie, whether you do decide to do the marathons or not.

I am sure you will get lots of good advice from the link that Stewart has included in his reply.

Hope everything turns out well for you.

Shazzie x

I am with Tina on this one, if you truly wished to do some charity work then complete it quietly, otherwise it does look like you are doing it for a reason. My brother-in=law has cerebral palsy he was completing a charity climb in Edinburgh, we sat as my sister in law boasted how they had gone to Edinburgh to support him and no other families had participated as my hubby pointed out other families may not have been able to afford to go through we live in Glasgow area. Ironically my oldest had gone didn’t crow about it help my b-i-l and other participates and after quietly went back home. My b-i-l and others were praising him for his thoughtfulness if you want to do something quietly is the best tactic.

trish

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To all of you thank you for your time to reply to me. I am just letting you.now.that I am.raising money for ms society and will run the Edinburgh marathon. Please can you spare 1 pound for this great charity Can you pass to everyone you know please send a txt LHJC99 £(AMOUNT POUNDS I.E £1, £5 etc) to 70070 xxx Please check out justgiving.com/RUN4LH Running Edinburgh marathon in may for ms society xx