rosie 59

can any help me with advice PLEASE i have been advised to have a live in carer i have found one she wants an aggrement which is a good idea but i dont know if shes being straight with me m e s he knows i don t know how living care works she is offering to do it for £500 a week but says that is day times ony any if any calls at night i will have pay hourly and hosital visits will also have to paid hourly she also says i must think of myself and dr op my family ie ignore my kids i havnt taken her on yet as live in she works for me weekends and cover work she is a very good carer i cant fault her for that but i dont know what to buy the way she says she will live perminalty and give up her room she rents am i just being used for a place to live rent free with all bills paid taking someone in my house is worrying my husband is 80 ant my eldest son lives with me as well

Hi Rosie,

Read your post but sorry don’t know.

Maybe someone else can advise or Citizen’s advice?

Difficult decision for you, don’t want to make a mistake.


Hi Rosie

I’m unconvinced by this carer. She lives in, you pay all bills, food etc, she is available to you during working hours only. She, meanwhile has a job where she cares for one person (I assume she doesn’t also care for your husband?), does little except personal care for you. And don’t forget that you will inevitably need ‘out of hours’ or hospital visits to pay for in addition (why do hospital visits cost extra if they are during the working day?).

And she earns £500 per week. How about holiday pay? Does that accumulate on top? You might need to get advice on that. Also if you work for only one person, you cannot be self employed, she therefore becomes your employee - have you considered National Insurance? Again, I think you need advice on your position. You may find it costs you quite a bit more than £500 each week (aka £26,000 per year!)

Who advised you to have a live-in carer? Have they also got experience in how it should work in practice? And what is a reasonable rate of pay?

I don’t personally have any experience in this, it’s just my gut reaction that there is more involved than just a simple transaction.

I think your husband is quite right to be worried.


I get about £60.00 a day working as a ta in a school I only work 5.30 hours, your carer is well above the national average wage. When I worked as a nanny you took the children to the hospital, doctors or dentists as part of your job and I had more than one child to look after sometimes 3 aged 1, 3, and 6. I also took them to birthday parties. She would be quite well paid.


Hi if she is only going to do day work you might as well just have a care worker who will come in the day and do all your stuff, shopping take you to hospital appointments. If she is living in she should include all the extra bits in her costings.

You have a son cant he help you?

its not an unreasonable amount but usually they will include everything in the weekly price.

I would have a word with an agency and find out how much they cost for full care 247. isnt that the idea of having someone live in so you can call on them when you need them, day or night.

Her weekly price isnt excessive but you want her to do the everything not just day. You can expect to pay 1,000 a week now for full live in care my friend pays that for her mum but she has dementia. so i would just ring a few places and get a feel for the prices to reassure you she isnt ripping you off.

It’s the ‘live-in’ part that would bother me. Will she have her own television, cooking facilities in her room or is she going to live as part your family. What if she wants to bring friends round etc. What if you or your husband/son don’t get on with her it may be difficult to get her to move out. It’s concerning when she says you should drop your kids. I wonder who decided you need a full time carer? With your family you need to work out just how much care you need. It may well be that you don’t need someone there 24 hours a day. I would


If you are going to employ someone, you need a structure in place, by which I mean a contract, she would need to fill in time sheets, there would be invoices and payslips and tax to deal with. You can find out about this at :

and you can use a payroll provider such as

I found this site which answers some of the basic questions you nay have

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My advice is to at the very least speak to Citizen Advice, but also Social Services, they would be able, or should be able to arrange or put you in touch with a genuine registered care worker.

Maybe I’m being over cautious but this “carer” sounds a bit dodgy to me ?


Rosie, I have no experience of live in carers but the one thing that has troubled me about your post is that this person has told you to drop your family/ignore your kids. Why would she say that? Why does she not want them involved in your care? It just seemed suspicious to me… I hope it all works out well for you though.


I wonder if its a money thing. my friends mum has full time carer she has alzheimers. because of travel issues she simply has to bring her closer and has found her an amazing home she can stay in. Her care worker is being an absolute cow, and even said you will kill your mother if you move her…""""!!! I mean what a thing to say. well lets face it she has a kushy job and doesnt want to loose over 1,000 a week.

I know nothing about live in care but a quick google brought up a lot of information. This is a Which guide that makes it clear that care management is usually done by professional care companies.

from what I’ve read live in care is 24/7 and the companies provide cover for the carers holidays and time off.

i am suspicious of the carer you are talking about. She’s going to live rent free, make £500 a week and not be full time. I don’t get that.

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