What do people say to you when you tell them you have M.S.? I normally get “How awful for you” and then they go on to tell me that someone they know have it and how the person is “suffering”.
It varies - from the “Oh how awful for you” to the seriously weird “You must be so brave”. (??) Yeah - right, I’m brave so bring it on MS! Good Grief!
Usually its a blank stare - people have no idea what M.S. is, what it does, how it affects people. They think its something you will get over - like Glandular Fever, or Flu. I kept being asked what sort of timeframe I had been given for recovery by certain people I work with.
Some people ask positive questions others are ignorant/thoughtless or downright stupid with the things they say.
I get told I’m brave too and that they admire me. Are we all supposed to break down just because we have M.S.? Another one is “You look happy enough”. What does that mean?
l do get a lot of ‘What an inspiration you are to everyone’. People see me out everyday - on my Tramper with my dogs - and they smile/wave and some even stop to speak to the dogs and me. l always try to keep smiling - sometime it is a ‘grimace’ that looks like a smile from a distance. lf anyone asks me how l am - l always say ‘Fine’ - and change the subject. l do not want to talk about my disabilities to anyone. They don’t really want to know all the nitty gritties. Life goes on and we must get on and make the most of it while we can. Most people want to see me sitting down - as l am very bad on my legs - and do have terrible falls. But l would rather be propped up - or holding onto my rollator for safety. l have a fear of sitting for too long and not being able to get up.
Very few people understand the concept of MS. And as we are all different it is difficult when people compare you with someone they know who has MS. l have always been a person who enjoys the outdoors - my dogs/horses etc. And also cooking and entertaining. Which l still do.
It is a matter of attitude as most things in life are. I tend to tell people I have good days and bad days when it comes to M.S. and then bore them with stories of my cats if I want them to leave me alone. Normally works!
my 'favourite ones are:
when people virtually sprint away from me,
immediately being offered the use of the jacqueline du pre film, so i can see her suffering(…?!),
how their friends auntie ethel/yoga instructor/florist used to have ms as it can easily be cured these days,
“Used to have M.S.” We wish! x
Hi everyone I agree there are some ignorant people out there, myself and partner where out shopping and bumped into a mate of his ,don’t know why but my other half decided to blurt out I have just been dx with Ms,the mates wife then said “oh know that’s the dodgy one isn’t it how long have I left” i couldn’t believe it she was never one of my favourite people I was just glad I was stronger enough mentally to deal with it . That was 3 years ago and haven’t spoke to her since x
hell’s teeth, ‘how long have you…’, buy a heavy walking stick, just in case you run into her. some people are just SO sensitive to other people’s feelings.
There’s the well meaning but I’ll informed “They can stop in in its tracks now.” Or equally ill informed “They can do so much for it nowadays”
Then, less often but not helpful “How long have you…”
And of course so many of these people know someone who knows someone who has a friend or relative with MS and he/she is absolutely fine/really bad now. Delete as appropriate.